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Mother Or Wife: What Should I do?

Non Medical Discussion   >>  Discussion
   
 
 
Sanwal Group: Members  Joined: 07th Jun, 2007  Topic: 18  Post: 83  Age:  34  
Posted on:15th Aug 2007, 8:30am
 

Mother Or Wife: What Should I do?

salam,

kafi dair se is maslay k liay forum men rju krna chahta tha pr?

Actually main apni wife or beti ko apne pas out of country bulana chahta hun, ye kam maine 2 sal bad mother aur father ko haj krwa k krna tha. pr kuch naagzeer wajuhaat ki bina pr main ye kam whithin 6 month krna chahta hun.

msla ye hai k mother ka kehna hai k ye theek nahi hai Q k wo meri beti (2 year) k bgair nahi reh sakti, lekin meri wife ye qadam jald az jald uthana chahti hai, naagzeer waja kia hai? main yaha nahi btana chahta.

ab samj main ye nahi ata k mother ki bat manu ya wife ki, pr us waja k tehat (jis ka upar zikr kia hai, k main btana nahi chahta)hume apni bat mnwani pr rahi hai, agar main ye kam krta hun to ALLAH naraz hota hai mother ka dil dukhane se or mother b, or agar wife ki na manu to wo wja or wife preshan krte hain.

kuch samj nahi ati k kia kru, msla b hal ho or koi naraz b na ho !

plzzZ give me ur goos comments, i m waiting !

thanxxX

  

kim84 Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 113  Post: 786  Age:  30  
Posted on:15th Aug 2007, 8:58am
 

MERY MUTABIQ!

Bhai tumhari pareshani koi badi preshani ni....kbi bi zindagi my himat nhi harna..chyee kitny hi masil samnay aiii...

1) MOTHER: Dekho k jo baat ap ki mother agr ghe-islami nhi kr rhi to first prefrence mother ko do....Us kii baat manaooo....Bcoz u r not telling the reason...Mry mutabiq tum Mother ko prefence doo..

2) WIFE: Wife ko samjhaoo k MOTHER ka darja....zyada hi....Pyar sy smjhaoo us ko dil sy smjhaoo gy to man jayee gee..

Rgs

Ur Bro

My Reply Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 2  Post: 2393  Age:  46  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 4:29am
 

waldah ko razi kare

mard par lazim hai keh waldah ki bat mane aur aurat pa lazim hai keh woh apne shohar ki bat mani. ap samajhte hai keh ap ko apni wife aur beti ko out of country bulana zaroori hai tu ap apni waldah ko kisi tarah razi kare. agar aap ki walda razi nahi hoti tu phir ap apni wife aur beti ko filhal out of country na bulai. 
Sanwal Group: Members  Joined: 07th Jun, 2007  Topic: 18  Post: 83  Age:  34  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 7:48am
 

salam

filhal to na bulau, ok, pr walda ka kehna hai k log 30, 30 sal ese he guzar dete hain, wo ye bat nahi smjte k 30 sal pehle walo or hum main bht farq hai, 2 sal wait kru ga to b yei msla, 5 sal, to b same, is liay ye bat hr wqt zehan main gomti rehti hai k kru to kia kru? kia ho ga?

main apni wife k bina ziada arsa reh b nahi skta, ab HUDA he hai jo is msle ko hal kre, agr main apni bat mnwa b leta hun to sb mjboor ho k mje na dene wali ijazat denge, jis main baro ki bat na mannay pr sb naraz or Alah b.

really, i am very very upset !
hr namaz k bad b ALAH se dua krta hun k koi hal nikl ay, ab sb b dua kijiay ga PLZ k koi asani ho jae.

thanxxX (My Reply and Mr. Kim)

zeb Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 114  Post: 13607  Age:  33  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 8:06am
 

dont worry

Dont worry sanwal bhai

ap bilkul thik keh rahey hain k baron ki marzi k khilaf jana bht bara gunah hai...bcoz is se Allah naraz hota hai...

main yahi kahun ga k filhal ap ko apni walidah ki bat manni chahiye aur apni biwi ko samjhana chahiye... aur bad mein sath sath apni walda ko is bat k liye raazi kertey rahen k wo apki biwi aur bachi ko ap k pas bhejeyn... ap unhen ye ehsas dilaiye k ap un k baghair nahi reh sktey aur apni walidah k hukem se unehn apne pas bulana chahtey hain

Aur bilkul sahi keh rahey hain....Allah se dua mangen...roz 5 waqt namaz perhen aur regularly Quran perheyn...InshaAllah ap ka masla jald solve ho jaye ga...dont worry

Sanwal Group: Members  Joined: 07th Jun, 2007  Topic: 18  Post: 83  Age:  34  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 11:07pm
 

thanx

salam,

thanxxX a lot, dekhe ab Huda ko kia manzor hai, Huda jo krta hai behtr krta hai.

take care

wasalam

hopeful Group: Members  Joined: 14th May, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 20  Age:  34  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 11:40pm
 

does ur mother loves u.

      meray khiyal se ap ki mother ki ziyadti hai k yo ap ki wife aur beti ko ap se door kar rahi hain.i think k yeh koi solid reason nahi hai k beti choty hai,is leiy wo out of country nahi janey deti.i think k wo is tarah gunnahgar hongi, agar wo husband/wife ko seperate kare gi.foriegn countries may ladies ko akailay hi apnay kids sunbhalney hotey hain,even pregnancy may bhi akailay sub kuch sumbhalna hota hai,magar wo yeh sub kuch khushi se kerti hain,qk un k leiay un ka husband key saath hona hi kafi hota hai.trust me ye mera experience hai.apki bivi ko agar pakistan mai dunia bhar ki khushi da de jai, to bhi wo ap k baghair dukhi ho gi.aur ap ki beti ko is waqt ap ki ziyada zaroorat hai,isleiay ap apni mother ko sumjhain k yeh apka aur apki bivi ka qanooni, islami right hai k wo ap k saath rahe.ek loving mother  ko hamesha apne bete ki khushi azeez hoti hai, aur wo is k leiay sacrifice kerti hai.
Sanwal Group: Members  Joined: 07th Jun, 2007  Topic: 18  Post: 83  Age:  34  
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 12:16pm
 

i have same thinking BUT?

kia kru main walda ko naraz nahi krna chahta, or wife or beti k bger b nahi reh skta, smjane ki bht koshish krta hun abi b koshish jari hai pr ! ! !

Alah ka shukr hai hr lehaz se set hun, or un ki hr hwahish puri krne ka wada b krta hun pr najanay Q wo manti he nahi, phir kabi kabi ye sochta hun k agr main ne apni bat mnwa li, to kal ko is k saza mje kisi or soorat main na mile jis ki waja se main mazeed preshan ho jata hun.

mere Allah koi rasta nikal de, AMIN

thanxxX

byee

S123 Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 30  Age:  35  
Blocked
Posted on:18th Aug 2007, 1:13pm
 

My Suggestions

If some one wants to live with his parents it should be appreicated and we all know that parents are the ones who cared about us even more than thier own lives. So in thier old age if we will become their arms they wuld definitely feel proud.

But we should also understand the feelings of our partner and should take her evey thing very seriously afteall we have to bear childern from them and our behavour must do its part in the growth of our childern.

Sanwal Group: Members  Joined: 07th Jun, 2007  Topic: 18  Post: 83  Age:  34  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 8:02am
 

thanxxX

salam,

u posted good suggestions but still i can't decide what should i do? i didn't forget the place of my Parents but also i can't live without my wife and daughter.

and can't leave job from here, coz i have very good job who is better for my whole family and future.

so i ll c, what ll happen in future.

thank u very much

bye 

 

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4646  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 1:28pm
 

i think

 

i think ye problm kuch is tarah ka hai ke female and male ko same mashwara nahi dia ja sakta hai.

for female i want to say,jaise ke dusron ne likha hai,

apki shadi ho chuki hai,ab apko apne Husband ki marzi se chalna chahye.Not parents.

Mother father ka darja koi nahi le sakta,unke Haqooq apni jaga hain.lekin ek Ladki shadi ke bad use apne husband ko tor tareekon se zindagi guzarni chahye.Uske sath mashware se jo mil kar Faissla karen.

aksar Ghar wahi kharab hote hain jahan pe ladki apne Ghar walon(mother sis father)ki baton me akar apne husband ki marzi ke khilaf chalti hain.

2,agar apka husband ghalti pe ho,wo bat jo deen ke khilaf ho to phir apko sachayi (Deen)ka sath dena chahye.

For male

Ladkon ke lye bhi same hi hai sab,but mai yahan pe kisi ladke ko ye mashwara nahi dungi ke wo sirf aur sirf apni biwi ki sune.

But ladkon me ye gun zaroor hona chahye ke agar wife aur mother me na bane to donon ko kisi na kisi tarah makhan shakhan laga kar mana le.

agar biwi ki ghalti hai to mother ke samne uski insult na kare,agar mother ki ghalti hai to biwi ke samne insult na kare balke akaile me bat kare....

just Diplomasy...warna us bande ko donon me se ek ko chorna pad jata hai ya phir ghar me ladai jhagde bardash karne padte hain

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4646  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 1:39pm
 

sorry wrong massege send kar diya

sorry maine apna answer wrong topic pe send kar dia hai

 

Sanwal

mera khayal hai ke apko apni wife ko apne pas bula lena chahye.i think ye koi jawaz nahi hai jo apki mother apko keh rahi hain ke wo apki beti ke beghair kaise rahengi.

dekhen ap apni biwi ko shadi  kar ke laye hain,apne sath rehne ke lye,not with ur mother.

thik hai u dont live togerther,but ap ki biwi ka ap pe haq hai apki beti ka ap pe haq hai.Han ye zaroor hai agar ap apni wife ko mana sakain,aur wo man jati hain ke ap unko kuch der bad bulaenge to apka massla hall ho jata hai.

mera khayal ye hai ke agar apki wife nahi manti to apko unko bula lena chahye,kyunke wo koi najaiz farmaish nahi kar rahi.Rahi apki mother ki bat to ap unko behla bhi sakte hain ke ap unko bhi jaldi bula lenge ya ap holidays me wife ke sath pk jaenge

 

but ur wife have this right ,ke wo apse ye khwaish rakhen ke ap unko jald se jald bulalen.han agar apki mother ke pas koi aur jawaz hota..jaise ke wo bemaar hotin to apki wife ko thodi der rukna chahye,lekin iisi koi waja nahi hai to phir ap unko bulalen

 

AK-47 Group: Members  Joined: 10th Aug, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 128  Age:  30  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 2:10pm
 

yaar

 yeh bht commom masla hai ajkal

aik to i dun get this that why kids , when they grew up, starts ignoring their parents ...

come on yaar unhon nay ap ko pala posa bara kia.. un ka huq ziada hai ya uss ka jo ap ki life mai haredly 3 years hue ai hai

You are husband.. samjhain apni wife ko agar nai manti to hukam dain.. Islam mai kaha gaya hai kay parents ki har jaiz baat mano...

hope you will do good with your parents

have a nice time tc

username Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 25  Age:  41  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 2:19pm
 

Solution

Yar as far as my personal opinion is concerned, mother ka darja waqi bahut buland he, iss me koi shak nahi.

Lekin humari society bhi ajeeb o ghareeb he. mera mashwara ap ko yeh he ke syasat (politics) se kaam lo. mother bhi khush rahay aur beewi bhi naraz na rahay, he tou mushkil kaam lekin iss ke ilawa chara koi nahi.

Ye mera azmaaya huva tareeqa he, kasam se kamyaab hon..lol

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4646  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 2:29pm
 

ak-

ak..

 

apne bilkul thik farmaya,ke ma bap ne pala posa hai bada kia hai,unka Haq apni jaga hai.

But agar unhon ne apne bete ki shadi kardi hai to sanwal ki mother ko ye bhi exept karna chahye ke ab unke bete me uski biwi bhi hai,jo ke barabar ka haq rakhti hai.

and is bat se koi taluq nahi hai,chahe wo uski zindagi me 2 mahine se hi ayi ho chahe 6.sal ya..15 sal.

ye sarasar Ziyadti hai aur jhooti anna hai jo humare mashre me parents ye samjhte hain ke wo apne bete ki shadi ke bad ye haq rakhte hain,ke wo Faissla kar sake ke aj beta biwi ke pas ja sakta hai aj nahi.

aj wo use bazar lejyae...and and....why???

Ab Sanwal ki shadi hogai hai,he is independent,unko ye haq hai jab chahe biwi se milen na millen,use pane pas bulaen ya na bulaen.

balke sanwal agar is waqt is position mai hain ke wo ye aford kar sakte hain ke apni wife ko apne pas bulalen,to unko aisa karna chahye.Agar wo nahi bulate to ye unki ziyadti hai.

2baat ye bhi ke,isi tarah humare mashre me kharabiyan phailti hain.ab wo kitni der aur wife ke beghair guzara karenge??the fact ist a man need sex.to wo is tarah bohat jald ghalat raston pe chal sakte hain.Islam me ek Hadees hai,agar apko koi aurat achi lagi aur sex ki khwaish uthe to ghar ja kar apni wife se sex kare,islye take uske zehan se Ghalat aurat ke khayalat na hon.

sorry mujhe apki ye bat pasand nahi ayi,kyunke mera khayal hai phir sanwal ki mother ko unki shadi hi nahi karni chahye thi.ye sarasar ziyadti hai ke wo husband and wife plus there child ko juda rakhain.(mere khayal se wo is waqt gunehgar hongi agar wo apni bewaja zidd pe qaim rahin)

Sanwal

apne ek nagreez waqiye ka zikar bhi kia hai jo ke ap bata nahi sakte,agar mujhe ma÷lum hota to mai apko aur better mashwara de sakti,but zaroor koi khas bat hi hogi is lye apko chahye,

Hallat  aur Haqooq ko dekh kar insaaf pasandi se Faissla karen.u know better ur problm,u told ke ap apni wife ke beghair nahi reh sakte...mai to yehi mashwara de sakti thi

age apki apni marzi hai ap apni wife ke sath ziyadti karte hain ya nahi.

and also u are not a child that u cant explain ur mother,ap me ab itna hossla hona chahye ke ap apni mother se kahain ab ap apni wife ke beghair ziyada arsa nahi reh sakte.apko unko samjhana chahye ke ye koi badi bat nahi hai agar wo apki beti se udas ho jaengi.

 

username Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 25  Age:  41  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 2:45pm
 

reply

yeh andar ki bahoo bol rahi he...lol .....please no offense

regards.

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4646  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 3:00pm
 

username

han mr mai is waqt khud ko us Ladki ki jaga rakh ke soch rahi hun.aur ek saas ki jaga bhi rakh ke socha hai,aur mere zehan ne jo kaha wahi likh diya.

waise bhi,shadi ke bad bohat mushkil hota hai husband ke beghair rehna,mai is Dor se guzar chuki hun.So Tujarba bol raha hai.

 

username Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 25  Age:  41  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 3:14pm
 

sunehri76

ap ki baat apni jaga bilkul sahi.

lekin in dono (saas-beewi) ke chakkar me bechara shohar hi phasta he. Aur yehi cheez me ne Sanwal ko samjhanay ki koshish ki he ke try to solve the problem in a dimplatic way.

Kasam se, me ne tou syaasat shaadi ke baad hi seekhi he...lol

Regards.

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4646  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 3:20pm
 

ohhhoo

yes u are right,agar inka mamla siyasat se nipat jata hai than it is the best way.

agar sanwal kamyaab ho jate hain is me,ke wife bhi na naraaz ho aur mother bhi razi than its for him now the best way.

phir sanwal ke lye massla yehi hai ke biwi ko kisi tarah razi karlain..but agar wo na mani than....to phir unko ek ko naraaz karna padega.

u said.....Kasam se, me ne tou syaasat shaadi ke baad hi seekhi he...lol

thodi si sanwall ko bhi sikha dein ap,unko mashware dain ke wife  or mother ko kaise makhan lagaya jaye..after all ap tujarbekaar ho chuke hain;)

username Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 25  Age:  41  
Posted on:19th Aug 2007, 3:37pm
 

han na

tou aur kya, kamyaab admi ka yehi raaz he ke "na heeng lagay na phatkari"

Buss iss me shohar ko kadam phonk phonk ker rakhna parta he, kyu ke yeh sirf maa aur beewi hi ki jang nahi, bulke maa ke saath saath behno ki fauj bhi shamil hoti he, lol

Sanwal, yar kidher ho, aj dil se asay asay raaz nikal rahay hain aur tum topic cher ker ghayeb ho gaye ho.

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