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Intercourse: Why I Donot Enjoy During Intercourse?

Married Women Problem   >>  Frigidity
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rubi Group: Members  Joined: 13th Dec, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 6  Age:  34  
Posted on:14th Dec 2007, 1:19am

Intercourse: Why I Donot Enjoy During Intercourse?

I am sure my question will qualify as the most unusual one, but I am so worried about it that I cannt tell you. My problem is that I am not able to enjoy sexual intercourse at all, even though i have been examined many times by different gynecologists and they all tell me I am perfectly normal. I am otherwise easily aroused and used to masturbate sometimes before marriage. it's only been 5 months since i have been married, but i thought it never took so long to enjoy sex. Is someone out there with a similar problem; a woman who has no known problems in her body but still has no pleasure with sex?

I have had two episoded of bacterial vaginosis during those five months, and during that time sex hurt, but at other times when my vagina was free of infection, i never liked to have sex. please please tell me if you know it's a common or a normal thing. or am i the only one. What to i do about it? please don't tell me its pshychological. I think not.

AAAA Group: Members  Joined: 14th Dec, 2007  Topic: 0  Post: 1  Age:  50  
Posted on:14th Dec 2007, 11:41pm

Same problem with my wife too

Sorry a male is replying you but my wife has the same feelings. She never feels any pleasure and doesn't responds at all (sometimes I feel that I am having sex with a dummy), it appears to be a one sided game. When I ask her did she feel enjoyment, she says NO. When I insist she says yes she did feel but never discuss. This situation gives me a lot of tension and I often feel that perhaps there is some fault in me and I curse myself but Alhamdolillah I am absolutely normal.


I think working women especially who are tired or have lot of work related tensions in mind usually do not give full attention towards this mandatory duty and consider it the biggest problem particularly during weekdays; do not feel enjoyment while having sex or the other thing that comes to mind that they do not feel enjoyment when they have some hard feelings for their husbands and dislike their contact.


Letís see what others say, and if anyone has some good advice for my wife's problem, please share with me.


Aag Group: Moderators  Joined: 21st Nov, 2007  Topic: 22  Post: 1130  Age:  39  
Posted on:14th Dec 2007, 6:47pm


Mera khayal yah hai ka yah psychological effect hi hai aur agar yah nahi to ho sakta hai ka apka husband apka sath sahi techniques use nahi kartain hongai yah foreplay sahi nahi kartai hongai jis ki wajha sai apko sex mai maza nahi ata hai. Meri advice apko yahi hai ka ap apna husband sai discuss karain kiyu ka abhi apki shadi howai din hi kitna howai hain.

Waisa yah bhi hota hai ka agar husband wife ka bech mai personal yah family problems hota hain to woh bhi sex ko sahi sai enjoy nahi kar pata hain. i think u must talk with each other.

zeb Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 114  Post: 13598  Age:  37  
Posted on:15th Dec 2007, 9:06am


bilkul thik baten kahin hain Aag ne ap ko

ap apne husband se is barey mein discuss keryen...aur forplay ka time berha k dekheyn....

Wanted Group: Members  Joined: 13th Dec, 2007  Topic: 2  Post: 12  Age:  38  
Posted on:17th Dec 2007, 8:31am

Same problem with my Wife


    Please reply me

My WIFE also have same problem. We married 2months ago.

but She don't enjoy any sex. and don't have any feelings for sex.


what is the Reason.



Aag Group: Moderators  Joined: 21st Nov, 2007  Topic: 22  Post: 1130  Age:  39  
Posted on:17th Dec 2007, 7:35pm


if u are also facing same  problem then u must read all post from top to bottom or u must wait for further posts.
rubi Group: Members  Joined: 13th Dec, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 6  Age:  34  
Posted on:26th Dec 2007, 4:38am


Isn't there any woman out there who has the same problem? Or am i the only one who still feels sex is a joy less activity?

pinky7861 Group: Members  Joined: 06th Oct, 2007  Topic: 44  Post: 1348  Age:   
Posted on:26th Dec 2007, 4:52am


   It is related to Msturbation.  The thing is that if getting sexual pleasure was associated with MB where u were able to get pleasure as much as u wanted and in anyway u wanted it.  Now in a sexual relationship with a man it is totally different.  U do not have total control so yr mind is not accepting it. 

      I think for the solution options I need to go back to check.  For now I believe it has been the reason.  One question yo u is that if still u do MB, do u think u will get orgasm??? or what ?? plz tell me.

rubi Group: Members  Joined: 13th Dec, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 6  Age:  34  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 3:47am

doubt it

well, yes, i do get an orgasm every time i masturbate even now. But sex doesn't even bring me close to that. i was wondering what the average time for a woman to reach an orgasm is. How muct time I mean. thanks
amraan Group: Members  Joined: 19th Dec, 2007  Topic: 0  Post: 2  Age:  41  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 4:02am

young man

mera khyal say psychological problem he hay app k sath
Hangama Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Dec, 2007  Topic: 39  Post: 1284  Age:  42  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 6:43am


Sab pharna ka baad andaza to yahi hota hai ka apko psychological problem hi hai aur acha yahi hoga ka ap apna husband ka sath kisi achai psychiatrist ka pas jain.
BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3584  Age:  31  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 7:57am

Re: Hangama & Rubi

Hungama Bahi Yah per bhi kafee loog Psychology jaantey hain .... Rubi sister app chahein tou maslah yahan bhi share kar saktey hain agar app Psyciatist k pass janey se hesitate kartey hain ....... May ALLAH bless you
seriously Group: Members  Joined: 12th Dec, 2007  Topic: 24  Post: 313  Age:  61  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 3:13pm

First of all a clarification.

I feel that the forum members are confusing two different branches of treatment and diagnosis.

Please read the following for clarification:

A psychologist is an expert in psychology, the systematic investigation of the human mind, including behavior, cognition, and affect. Psychologists are usually categorized under a number of different fields, the most well-recognized being clinical and counseling psychologists, who provide mental health care and conduct substantive and applied research. Doctoral level trained psychologists are also the experts in the provision/administration and interpretation of psychological tests and assessment.

A psychiatrist is a physician who specializes in psychiatry and is certified in treating mental diseases. As part of their evaluation of the patient, psychiatrists are one of only a few mental health professionals who may prescribe psychiatric medication, conduct physical examinations, order and interpret laboratory tests and electroencephalograms, and may order brain imaging studies such as computed tomography or computed axial tomography, magnetic resonance imaging, and positron emission tomography scanning.

Contrast :

In the U.S., licensed psychologists hold a doctorate in their field, while licensed psychiatrists hold a medical degree with a specialty in psychiatry. Psychiatrists are physicians who have earned an MD or a DO professional degree, whereas psychologists have earned a doctor's degree PhD, PsyD, or EdD. The Ph.D. is the highest required doctoral degree awarded by universities. The term "Doctor" means "Teacher of Teachers" or "Learned Professional." Psychiatrists generally spend shorter periods of contact time with clients/patients, and the principal method of treatment is psychopharmacology.[citation needed] Conversely, clinical and counseling psychologists generally rely upon psychological assessment and the use of psychotherapy to relieve psychological distress. It is not uncommon for people suffering from mental illness to combine these services to maximize their impact. Many psychologists conduct research-based, standardized cognitive and projective testing to guide the diagnosis of intellectual disabilities, behavioral/mood disorders, and personality disorders; these test results also inform treatment approaches. Administration and interpretation of the majority of these standardized test instruments require specialized Doctoral level training in psychology.

seriously Group: Members  Joined: 12th Dec, 2007  Topic: 24  Post: 313  Age:  61  
Posted on:27th Dec 2007, 3:57pm

Give it some time and add some flavor to your love life.

Are you  complaining about not to be able to achieve orgasm , or you do not get any kind of arousal at all ?

They are two different issues.

I would say give it some more time . If it is your arranged marriage it will take time for you two to tick togather and tango. In case of arranged marriages it takes time to gain the level of intimacy which you are looking for. Eat out with your husband , go to pickincs, movies and other fun activities togather to develop intimate relationship with your husband.

For achieving orgasm and arousal try different techniques and different positions. It will help too if as part of your foreplay you guide your husband to masterbate you. You are a doctor and in Canada you should be able to find some good book on sextual techniques. Internet is full of websites with advice for married  women on how to enjoy sex after getting married if they have been masterbating during their bechelor years.

Trust me you are not alone with this problem. It is not allowed to post links therefore I cannot do that but there are websites on women health covering same exact topic. Do a google search with keywords masterbation and intercourse and you will find tons of information on this topic.

rubi Group: Members  Joined: 13th Dec, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 6  Age:  34  
Posted on:24th Jan 2008, 5:06pm

still nothing

i still haven't been able to enjoy intercourse, nor have an orgasm from it. how long should a man stay inside before a woman has an orgasm from sex? can any woman here tellme that?
Hangama Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Dec, 2007  Topic: 39  Post: 1284  Age:  42  
Posted on:24th Jan 2008, 6:31pm


Sab ki post pharna ka baad bhi aagar apka masla hal nahi hota hai to mai to yahi kahonga ka ap doctor ka pas jain. Doctor sai apna pura masla discuss karain aur agar apki problem solve hojai to mera khayal sai ap hamai zaror yaha pa sab batain kiyu ka hosakta hai aur bhi koi ho jo jisko yah problems ho aur woh sharam ka marai nahi  puch raha ho.
Bili_miau Group: Members  Joined: 20th Oct, 2007  Topic: 17  Post: 871  Age:  31  
Posted on:24th Jan 2008, 7:31pm


why dnt u add a lil spice in ur sexual life? try sexy clothes whn gng to nightdreses lingerie etc etc......have a flavoured lavender mint,....roses or any other sort of bath......try different rooms...or simply just change the environment of the room!!like put candles in ...have a room freshner etc etc...take more time for lil steps like taking off clothes......kissing etc...these lil steps will make u excited with done slowly !! and eventually be ready with ur full mind..and say that u can do it....if u folllow simple steps u can achive ur goal.. think that every night is not less than the first wedding night

am i right?

zeb Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 114  Post: 13598  Age:  37  
Posted on:25th Jan 2008, 9:40am

to rubi

billi's suggestions are very good

plz apply these

otherwise contact a good psychatrist

paree1 Group: Members  Joined: 16th Feb, 2008  Topic: 3  Post: 58  Age:  32  
Posted on:17th Feb 2008, 10:32am


bhai logh aur ruby sister mei app ko  apni akal kay mutabiq hal bta sahkti hoon coz mei female honay kay athy samj sahkti hoon sub say barhi kay feelings na ho tu ais liya hota humray andar hish naheen hai husband ko toush kay samjnay ki auktahaT HOTI HAI app ko chaoiye itna fel krien who male app female ha Husand wife hai theek romantic movis dahka karien aik pp kay shoar app ko samjaty han yani app sharmti naheen tu app ko chaiye husband say disscuss karien aur husband logh ko chaiye aun ki wifes fel karien tu aun ko chaiye aun say kafhi daree payr karien aksar yeh hota wife lki appn wish hoti ha lahkin husband ko appni parhi hoti ha agar wife itni free ha tu app aun ko kah sahkti hai app ko kia passand hai naheen tu husband ko samj  jana chaie aus kay kiss tarha fom karnay say biwei behaviour karti ha i mean app logh aik dossray say disscuss karien agar wife kay mutabiq khuch na ho tub bh feel naheen hota husband ko chaitye wif e say barhpur play karien who bhi majbhor ho jaien i hope u all underrstand

greatlady Group: Members  Joined: 15th Sep, 2007  Topic: 47  Post: 160  Age:  40  
Posted on:26th Feb 2008, 3:30am

Sister RUBI

app ki app k shohar se compatibility nhi ho pa rahi hay mere andazy k mutabik.

ya to app after/during intercourse discharge nhi ho pa rahi ho aur ye kaam kai baar ho chuka hay jis ki waja se app me wo sex k lea enjoy nhi raha.ok

app ne apne hasbnd k bare me kuch nhi bataya k wo app se sex kerne ki is position ko kaisy handal kerte hain ya wo kis tarhan sex kerte hain i mean sex kaisy shoro kerte hain jis condition me app bata rahi ho is stage pr to sex itna hota hay k kr kr k tang aa jaty hain pr dill nhi bharta lolz,

but app apna sawal detail se batao t k sub ko mashwara dene me asani ho.



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