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Relation Between Father-In-Law & Daughter-In-Law?

Religion and Culture   >>   Religious Questions
 
 
Shzi Group: Members  Joined: 21st Oct, 2009  Topic: 8  Post: 15  Age:  31  
Posted on:29th Dec 2009, 1:26pm
 

Relation Between Father-In-Law & Daughter-In-Law?

Asslamualikum!

please yeh bataye kae islam mae susar aur bahoo kae darmian kua adaab rakhee gain hain.

bahoo kis had tak un ki har baat aur khidmat kar sakti hai.

aur kua susar aur saas dono ka aik hi adab ka level hai yaan farq hai.

Thanks.




info1234 Group: Members  Joined: 27th Nov, 2009  Topic: 14  Post: 600  Age:  31  
Posted on:29th Dec 2009, 3:04pm
 

wife sirf apnay husband ki paband hai

agar aap pure islamic reference chahtay hain tau u can search rights and duties of a wife. islam ma basically hr muslim k 2 levels hain, aik ehsan aur aik farz... farz woh duties jo kisi se hasil karnay k liay ussay majboor kia jaey ga, aur ehsan woh jinhain aik muslim apni marzi se karna chahay tau us k liay be intaha sawab hai, magar koi bhi ussay us kaam par majboor nahi kar sakta.

keeping this in view, u will find duties of a wife in sahi bukhari, sahi muslim etc, u should read them directly... aur us hisab se wife ki duties ma saas susar ki khidmat uska farz nhi hai, na hi ussay majboor kia ja sakta hai..... woh khidmat uska ehsan hai, be intaha ajar o sawab hai, BUT husband responsible hai k woh apnay parents ki khidmat karay aur un ki zaroortun ka intzaam karay, woh apni wife ko hargiz apnay parents ki khidmat par majboor nahi kar sakta.... woh alag baat hai k wife apni khushi se ehsan karna chahay tau she will get unlimited sawab and love of her husband.

otherwise, islamically father-in-law se wife k liay pardah hai, she cannot even touch him, isi tarhan husband k brothers se wife ka total pardah hai.... wife is responsible only for her husband.

myrizvi Group: Members  Joined: 20th Apr, 2008  Topic: 130  Post: 7706  Age:  55  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 3:05am
 

Jazak Allah info1234

well explained. 100% true islamic picture pesh ki hai apnay...

but

above statements say koi new bahoo kaheen "gumraah" nah hojaa.ay... yeh batata chaloun k indo.pak maiN amooman joint family sytem maiN hi aik bahoo ki amad hoti hai..........bahoo jiss ghar maiN aati hai woh amooman oskay shauher ka nahi balkay oskay susar ka hota hai (bil.amoom)..... goya woh indirectly apnay saas-susar k ghar rahti hai.

ab agar aisay maiN koi bahoo, yeh samajhtay howay k saas susar ka mujh par koi farz nahi, onki baatouN /marzi par bilkul dhayaan nah day, onhaiN bilkul lift nah karaa.ay aur sirf aur sirf husband ki baat maanay (husband amooman shaam /raat ko ghar aataa hai. jabkay saas-susar 24 hrs oskay saath rahtay haiN............ to bahoo ka yeh behaviour ossay saas-susar ko apna mokhalif banaa degi. youN oskay khilaaf oskay susraal maiN aik mahaaz khara hojayegaa..........agar husband alag ghar afford nahi karsakta apni kamaayee say to woh biwi ko alag rental ghar maiN lay jayegaa......... youN saraa azaab bahoo ko hi bhugatnaa hogaa..............mahaz iss confusion say k mera saas susar par koi farz nahi.

bahoo ko chahaiyeh k woh jiss ghar maiN jaa.ay wahaaN k traditions ka khayaal rakhay...wahaaN jo log pahlay say jis jiss status maiN maujood haiN (jaisay susar /saas ghar k baRay /head /maalik)..........onki iss hasiyat ko dil say accept karay........onki batouN ko obey karay... aur agar koi ghalat baat saas susar kahay to hikmat say apnay husband say discuss karay.........totally refuse karkay apna ghar tabaah nah karay......... onsay ehteraam ka rishtah rakhay...susar /dewar say zeyadah free bhi nah ho aur bilkul islolate bhi nah rahay...........aik tawazun qaaim karay to insha Allah oski zindagi behtar guzregi

Waterr Group: Members  Joined: 15th Jul, 2009  Topic: 59  Post: 3783  Age:  27  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 6:25am
 

Very good islamic knowledge info123

Nice.. And yes, mother in law n father in law bhe like mother n father hotey hain n be respected..

ISLAM ney to wife ko ye right be daya ha k wo apna alag cooking area n rehney ko mang sakti ha..

Merey khayal mai agar wife n husband sirf apne haqooq nai bulkey Faraiz b shadi se pehle read kar lain tou koi problem nai hoge new life me... Above all joint family system mai best ha k agar portion alag houn if possible for every son etc..is se privacy b rehti ha

" aur us hisab se wife ki duties ma saas susar ki khidmat uska farz nhi hai, na hi ussay majboor kia ja sakta hai..... woh khidmat uska ehsan hai, be intaha ajar o sawab hai"

yes,agreed

aur agar uske in law b usko Ye Margin Dain k wo Apna Ghar chor k aik New Set up mai ayi ha aur time req ha for understanding tou ye best ha..

husband n wife Must Read Their Rights as well as Obligations in light of Islam and dnt impose society Made Traditions on each other Blindly then i think Many Problems And Quarrels would never arise

info1234 Group: Members  Joined: 27th Nov, 2009  Topic: 14  Post: 600  Age:  31  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 8:38am
 

nice thinkings by myrizwi

yes agreed with my rizwi, and waterr 100% agreed

well i just put a picture k this is our pure ideal islamic system.... actually hamain atleast yeh pata hona chhaiey k hmaray relegion k hisab se ideal system kia hai, us k bad phir  apnay system faults khatam karnay ki koshish ho sakti hai.

yes i always avoid talking on such issue because hmari newly married girls is say gumrah hi hongi, aur ghalat niyat se sirf apnay faiday ki baat sochain gi.

yes indo-pak ma joint family system hai, aur filhal aesa kuch nahi hai k achanak hi sab kuch change ho jaey, but joint family system k jo nuksanat hain woh sab k samnay hain, agar aap islam ko kasoti banain tau ajkal ka joint system aap ko har lehaz se unislamic aur primary source of problems nazar aey ga.

islam ma aik admi ki shadi ka maksad  hai k woh aik independent insan ban jaey qk uski sari mohtaji uski wife se khatam ho jati hai, ab woh aik independent unit (husband + wife) apni society ka load lenay k qabil ho sakay, un ma itni khuddari ho k woh apnay parents par depend karna pasand na karain, balkeh apnay parents ki khidmat karna aur unka load uthana pasand karain..

hmaray parents nay partition of indo-pak k after effects suffer kiay hain, is wja se woh khud joint family system ma rahay hain, woh khud sari zindgi apnay parents par dependent rahay hian lehaza woh apnay bachon ko bhi independent hota nahi dekhna chahtay, unki soch wohi hai k beta independent ho gaya tau hamain chor kar chala jaey ga.. unhay yeh sochna chaiey k jin logon ki aulad nahi hoti unhay bhi tau Allah hi rizk deta hai.....  wesay bhi agar woh apnay betay ko islami taleem detay tau  unka beta unka ghulam ki tarhan farmanbardar hota, jo independent ho kar aur ziada khidmat karay ga, qk quran hadis har jagah ussay yehi sikhain gay k Allah k bad tumharay walidain ka haq hai...

present scenerio ma baharhaal yeh aqal mandi nahi hai k aap just enjoyment ki niyat se apnay faiday k liay selfish ho kar achanak hi joint family system k against baghawat kar k sab tradiations k against isolate ho kar beth jain... hamain us ideal islamic system ka pata hona chaiey, phir usi ideal pic ko zehen ma rakh kar gradually sab ki feelings aur expectations ka khiyal rakh kar usi system k liay koshish karni chaiey, but apni next generation ki tarbeyat wesi karni chiaey k woh log wohi ideal islamic system revive kar sakain.

Waterr Group: Members  Joined: 15th Jul, 2009  Topic: 59  Post: 3783  Age:  27  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 8:56am
 

Info123

"actually hamain atleast yeh pata hona chhaiey k hmaray relegion k hisab se ideal system kia hai, us k bad phir  apnay system faults khatam karnay ki koshish ho sakti hai.yes i always avoid talking on such issue because hmari newly married girls is say gumrah hi hongi, "

NOPE, info Apko Zaror ISLAMIC knwldge Share Karna Chaheye , Yahan NEWly married MALE viewer bhe tou Hain Jo Male Show nism Ka Shikar Hain

Blkul we must knw our loopholes and Koi Sahe Knwldg Rakhne Wala De track nai hota

Jub Hum Islam Ko Aik Mukamal ZABTA E hayat Mantey Hain Har pahlo Of Life Mai Follow Karne ke Kosish Kartey Hain Tou Why Not This? Jo itna impt ha

Jub hum Husbnd k RIGHTS ka parchar kartey hain Why nt Wife's. JUB hum Saas Susar ke baat karte hain respect Ke Why Not Bahoo's

apne itni ache bbt tou btai k Khidmat pe AAJRO SWAB ha, bt Faraz Nai

mujhe Apke Islamic Awarnes Is mamley pe N Guftougo Ka Andaz Bohat achcha laga ha

apne Aik tarah se Khidmat Ka Kaha B Ha aur BOJH b nai Bunaya..

aur Andaze Bayan Imposing nai Convincing hona chaheye

myrizvi Group: Members  Joined: 20th Apr, 2008  Topic: 130  Post: 7706  Age:  55  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 9:32am
 

info123

masha Allah bahoot khoob, well said...jazak Allah

apnay manzae aur pasay manzar khoob batlaya hai.....islamic tareeqah yehi hai k shadi k baad new couple apna "new ghar' bhi start karay..... karachi ki memon community aur (punjabi) business chenuty community maiN yehi rewaaj kasrat say hai k woh apnay beToun ki shadi say qabal hi onkay alag rehaish ka arrange kardetay haiN...

memon community walay to etnay aqalmand haiN k tarfain maiN koi bhi shadi par dhela bhi kharch nahi karta... onka ijtemaa'ee nikaah memon masjid maiN hojata hai. jahaaN sharbat /chowarah taqseem hojata hai. dat's it...... dulhan walay aur dulha walay..."hasbay taufeeq" bahmi paisay milaa kar dulha k hawalay kar detay hain. jiss say dulha apna chota mota karobaar...baap say hatkar start kardeta hai... rehaish bhi alag kardi jati hai....... youN new couple ko parents ki aasher.baad bhi milti hai aur onhaiN apnay qadmouN par kharay honay ka moqa bhi milta hai...

hum sab muslims ko bhi issi ko follow karna chhahiyeh...shadi aur iski ghair islami rasoomaat par laakhouN rupess oranay ki bajaa.ay.....saadgi say shadi karaiN...aur couple ko iss bachi howi raqam say atleast separate rehaish faraham karaiN... agar business karna ho to yeh alag business start karaiN yaa phir job shob karaiN...

asal maiN parnaalaah ooper say neechay girta hai... yeh kaam parents k karnay ka hai nah k new couple ka......shadi say qabal dounouN parents mil jul kar pahlay hi say separate rehish /business ko arrange karaiN...... tab hi jaa kar baat banegi........ separate to bil.aakhir joray ko honaa hi hota hai, 2/4 saal baad ho 10/12 saal baad......magar tab tak (jointt family k sabab) sooratay haal bahoot kharaab hochuki hoti hai. bahoo, susraal maiN aur damaad n oski family laRki k maikay maiN "bad.naam" hochukay hotay haiN.... dounouN gharanouN k beech khaleej haail hochuki hoti hai........k after all hum sab insaani kamzoriyouN k haamil haiN aur islami taleemaat say sab hi dooooooor bhi.

lehaza best method yehi adopt hona chhaiyeh k parents apnay beTouN ki shadi say qabal hi oski separate residence ka intezaam bhi karaiN...bay shak shadi ki taqreeb par kuch nah kharch karna paray...yeh sauda bora nahi. aik hadees ka mafhoom hai k sab say behtareen shadi woh hai jiss maiN sab say kam kharch kia gaya ho......aur hum kahtay haiN k........ innalillahay wa inna elaihay raaje'oon.

Shzi Group: Members  Joined: 21st Oct, 2009  Topic: 8  Post: 15  Age:  31  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 1:16pm
 

Roel of Baho?

Thanks for all ones.

Lekin ap sab nae topic badal kar joint familt aur independent family ki tarf chale gaie.

Question yeh thaa kae bahoo susar ki kis had tak khidmat kar sakti hai?

aur saas aur susar ki respect mae kua farq hai yaani bahoo ku priority kis tarf dena chahaye.

yaan aese samj laen. kae agar kui susar apni bahoo sae kehta hai kae muje har rooz subh uth kae gale milo karo aur mae tumhara matha ur ankheny chomna chahata hoon tu bahoo kua kare.

bahoo un ku kehti hai kae yeh muje acha nahi lagtha, ap aesa na karo, wo apne husband ku batati hai aur saas ku bhi, saas apne mian sae kehti bi hai kae ap iss tarha naa kareny

abi tak uss ka husband khamosh hai wo yeh samjata hai kae agar mae nae kui baat apne papa sae ki tu wo us ka ulta matlab aese bi lae sakte hain kae wo kahaeny kae tekh hai mae aiyanda kabhi is sae baat bi nahi karoon ghaa .

tu yeh cheez tention aur laye gi gar mae .

ab bateny kae bahoo kua kare

suhar kua kare

aur saas kua kare.

please be positive and respected  during typing your answers .

thanks.

 

info1234 Group: Members  Joined: 27th Nov, 2009  Topic: 14  Post: 600  Age:  31  
Posted on:30th Dec 2009, 3:30pm
 

SHZI........

Dear shzi.. sorry if u got hurt, it wasnt meant to deviate the topic

agar aap is baat ko islamically poch rhay hain tau is baat ka islam se koi taluk nahi hai,. Islam ma kuch chizon ko saaf mana kar dia gya hai, agay un par koi behas nahi hai... jesay k saaf hukam hai susar se pardah... us pardah ki hadood ma bahu suser k liay khana waghera bana sakti hai, ya aur is kisam k matters jin ma  suser ki body ko touch na kia jaey.. but saas k sath kiss hug waghera sab kuch jaiz hai, aur jis tarhan bhi behtar ho sas ki khidmat ki ja sakti hai.

suser kiss hug karna chahain tau is case ma tau saaf saaf hukam hai k koi bhi larki even apnay father, husband, brother kisi ki bhi aesi baat mannay se saaf inkar kar sakti hai jo Allah aur Rasool SA k hukam k khilaf ho.

but present case ma yeh parday wali situation nahi hai tau ussay narmi aur pyar se unhay samjhana chahiay k islam ma iski kisi surat bhi ijazat nahi hai, na hi  yeh bahu ko pyar karnay ka respectful tarika hai. Allah nay jis baat se mana kia ho, koi bhi bazurg chahay jesa hi ho, us baat ko jaiz nahi kra sakta... but bahu kisi aur tarikay se unhay respect show kar sakti hai jis se un ka dil na dukhay.. woh apni saas k sath kiss hug kar le tau shaid suser samajh jain... husband ko chaiey k narmi se apnay father ko samjhaey... aur filhal compromise as per requirements...

asal ma jis system ki islam ma gunjaish na ho, phir bhi ussay adopt kia jaey tau islamically discuss karnay ko kuch bachta hi nahi hai.

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