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Urdu Jokes: Lets Share Jokes - I

Urdu   >>   Urdu Jokes
 
 
Yahoo Group: Members  Joined: 29th Jul, 2007  Topic: 14  Post: 50  Age:  39  
Posted on:8th Aug 2007, 7:58am
 

Urdu Jokes: Lets Share Jokes - I

 

Ek aadmi ko bhoolne ki bimaari hojati aur doctor ke paas jaata.

Patient: Doctor sahib mujhe bhoolne ki bahut aadat si hogayi hai ab ki baat ab hi bhool jaata hoon?

Doctor: Aisa kabse horaha hai aapko?

Patien: Kiya kabse hora !

More latest jokes coming soon.....

Yahoo Group: Members  Joined: 29th Jul, 2007  Topic: 14  Post: 50  Age:  39  
Posted on:8th Aug 2007, 8:08am
 

Safe to turn off your Computer

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.

 

Wife - would you like to have some snacks?

Husband - hard disk full.

 

Wife - have you brought the sari.

Husband - Bad command or file name.

 

Wife - but I told you about it in morning

Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.

 

Wife - hae Allah !forget it where's your salary.

Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.

 

Wife - at least give me your credit card,

i can do some shopping.

Husband - sharing violation, access denied.

 

Wife - i made a mistake in marrying you.

Husband - data type mismatch.

 

Wife - you are useless.

Husband - by default.

 

Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?

Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to

Reboot.

 

Wife - what is the relation between you & your

Receptionist?

Husband - the only user with write permission.

 

Wife - what is my value in your life?

Husband - unknown virus detected.

 

Wife - do you love me or your computer?

Husband - Too many parameters.

 

Wife - i will go to my dad's house.

Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will

Close.

 

Wife - I will leave you forever.

Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.

 

Wife - it is worthless talking to you.

Husband - shut down the computer.

 

Wife - I am going

Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer.

 

Regards,

 Yahoo

 

kim84 Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 113  Post: 786  Age:  33  
Posted on:8th Aug 2007, 1:29pm
 

Mery Mutabiq!

Zyada hasnay sy Allah k nabi(PBUH) ny mana farmaya hi...wo shaks zyada hansta hi jis ko moot ka dar na hoo..

Rgds

Your Faithfull

Ugly-Sana Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 7  Post: 539  Age:  34  
Posted on:11th Oct 2007, 5:51pm
 

Sardar Jokes

Doctor : App ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hain?
Sardaar : Hoga, Jarur hoga; 25 saal se mera khoon jo pee rahi hain....
--------------------------------------
Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main use SURPRISE doonga..!
----------------------------------------
Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "you will go to jail".
--------------------------------------
Sardar to Shopkeeper: - Mujhe India Ka Flag Dikhao,
Shopkeeper ne Flag dikhaya,
Sardar: - Isme aur Colour Dikhao.
-----------------------------------------
Sardar: Doctor help me, main jab baat karta hun to mujhe sirf awaaz sunai deti hain, aadmi nahin dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hain?
Sardar: Phone karte WAQT....




Ugly-Sana Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 7  Post: 539  Age:  34  
Posted on:11th Oct 2007, 5:52pm
 

Never Lie to Your WIfe

A man called home to his wife and said, "Honey I have been asked to go
fishing up in Canada with my boss & several of his Friends.

We'll be gone for a week. This is a good opportunity for me to get that
Promotion I'v been wanting, so could you please pack enough Clothes for a
week and set out my rod and fishing box, we're Leaving From the office & I
will swing by the house to pick my things up" " Oh! Please pack my new blue silk pajamas."

The wife thinks this sounds a bit fishy but being the good wife she did
exactly what her husband asked.

The following Weekend he came home a little tired but otherwise looking
good.

The wife welcomed him home and asked if he caught many fish?

He said, "Yes! Lots of Salmon, some Bluegill, and a few Swordfish. But why
didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to Do?"

You'll love the answer...

The wife replied, "I did. They're in your fishing box ....."
Ugly-Sana Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 7  Post: 539  Age:  34  
Posted on:11th Oct 2007, 6:15pm
 

Jokes

Ek pathaan saheb bazaar ja rahe thay, raastay me ek deewar per likha tha " Parhne wala bewakoof hai "
Pathan sahib ko ye parh kar ghussa aa gaya, Unho ne woh sentence mita kar likh dya ke " Likhne wala bewakoof hai "

 

Father was very anger to his son in account of his poor result in final exam, he said,
Father : Nalayek, paroos ki larki ko dekh woh exam me 1st aaii hai
Son : usi ko to dekhta tha jabhi fail ho gaya

_______________

A Son at college
Wanted More Money,
He sent a telegram to his father,
No money,
No fun,
Your son,

The father Replied,
How sad,
Too bad,
Your Dad...

________________

Aek Sahab Kafi Der Se Kapre Ki Dokan Par Kapra Dekh Rahe The_who Jo Bhi Kapra Dekhte Us Ki Garantee Pochte, Dokandar Kapre Ki Garantee Batate Batate Tang Akar Bola
,` Akhir Ap Ko Khareedna Kiya Hae?'''
Un Sahab Ne Kha'' Mujhe Adha Gaz Katan Apni Topi Ke Liye Chiye,,,
Dokandar Ne Adha Gaz Kapra De Diya,in Sahab Ne Is Ki Garantee Pochi- Dokandar Ne Gose Se Jawab Diya;;
Janab ! Ap Ka Sar Phat Jaye Ga Lekin Ye Kapra Nahi Phate Ga........heheheh




Aamir89 Group: Members  Joined: 28th Sep, 2007  Topic: 3  Post: 67  Age:  43  
Posted on:12th Oct 2007, 5:08am
 

Sardar Ji

 

1 baar 1 sardar Gangubai k ghar jata hai. Darwazy per knock karta ....

Gangubai: Kaun?

Sardar: mai....

Gangubai: mai kaun?

Sardar: tu gangubai.......

Aamir89 Group: Members  Joined: 28th Sep, 2007  Topic: 3  Post: 67  Age:  43  
Posted on:12th Oct 2007, 5:12am
 

to Kim84

 

My dear Friend,

app ne bilkul sahi hadees qoute ki hai. but ye un logo k liye hai jo har waqt hansi thathay lagate rehte hain. aj kal kyun k afratafri ka dour hai lehaza 1 2 minte k hansne muskurane se kuch nahi hota. 1 Sahadi farmate hain k hum ne Huzoor salalaho wasalam se zada muskurane wala nahi dekha.

ch Babar Group: Members  Joined: 15th Jul, 2007  Topic: 32  Post: 1875  Age:  43  
Posted on:12th Oct 2007, 4:12pm
 

Sardai ji

 Many Many years ago when Neoton was alive , he said to a Sardar: Impossible ka word meri dictionary main nahi hae,

Sardar: Te mama Dictionary dekh le leni si na

-------------------------------------

Sardar to his friend: I kiss my wife everyday before i go to office & U???

Friend: I kiss after u go to office

Sardar: Ha Ha Ha I kiss 1st.....




gladiolus Group: Members  Joined: 11th Oct, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 22  Age:  33  
Posted on:12th Oct 2007, 4:21pm
 

It is a real sign FUNNY!!!

Stay off the course . . . Or else!
```
BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3584  Age:  30  
Posted on:13th Oct 2007, 3:18am
 

My Jokes

Pic of a pretty office secretary was attached with the director's report in the financial statement of the company,
SECP inquired about it from the company's secretary
He replied " as per the requirements of the company Ordinance 1984
we have given the disclosure of director"s Intrest in the company"

1 Memon larka aur Memon larki ko ek dusre se pyar hogaya
ek din larki ne kaha k jab mera baap sojaye a to me ek sika phenku gi ,
tum andar aa jana. Raat ko larki ne sika phenka lekin larka sike phenkne
k ek ghante baad aaya. larki ne poocha k itni dair se q aaye to larka bOLa
" wo main sikka dhoond raha tha mila hi nai " larki boli " pagal wo to main
ne dhaga band k phenka tha "

Thappar Maarnay par NaraZ Wife se Husband bola: Aadmi usi ko maarta
hai jis se Pyaar krta hai.Wife ne Husband ko 2 thappar maaray aur
Boli:Aap kya samajhtay hain main Aapse Pyaar nahi kerti 

 



josh Group: Members  Joined: 30th Jul, 2007  Topic: 47  Post: 2282  Age:  40  
Posted on:24th Oct 2007, 9:12am
 

Tamam jokes bohat achay hain!

very nice and funny jokes. parh kar bohat maza aya. sab nay bohat achay jokes share kiye.
yahoo: both are nice jokes, 2nd joke first attempt mai nai parha gaya mujsay , baki saray jokes parhay , phir koshish ki k parh lon lekin itna lengthy dekh kar phir dar gaya,, phir saray jokes parh kar ab parha hai,, joke lamba hai lekin hai bohat hi funny.i like it.
sana apkay third post mai jo 4 jokes hain wo sab top class k hain or muje bohat ziada pasand aye or bohat hansi bi. Kapray wala joke bohat ziada funny hai. sir phat jaeyga lekin kapra nai hahaaa.
amir ka joke muje samajh nai laga. gangubai kon thi ?
ch babar : yar apka 2nd joke parh kar mera hans hans kar bura haal hogaya, bohat hi acha joke hai.
beautystar: bohat hi funny joke hai sikkay wala, or 3rd one bi acha hai .
JUNIOR(G) Group: Members  Joined: 21st Sep, 2007  Topic: 5  Post: 21  Age:  30  
Posted on:24th Oct 2007, 9:56am
 

main hisab mein kamzor hun:(

Assalam o alaykum.

ek ladka school jara tha raste mein usko ek budha milta hai aur kehta hai

budha:  beta ek 1 rupya chahiye sirf ek rupya dedo

ladka: kuch nahi bolta..............................

budha: beta sirf ek rupye ka sawa hai dedona

ladka: baba main hisab mein kamzoor hun..........:(

 

josh Group: Members  Joined: 30th Jul, 2007  Topic: 47  Post: 2282  Age:  40  
Posted on:25th Oct 2007, 5:41pm
 

Some Jokes: Sardar Jee Aa Rahay ho Ya Ja Rahay Ho!

====================
Once upon a time, a Sardarji saw a boy who wore his cap in the back direction. This event really harrased the social nature of sardarji and then he also decided to wear his pagari in the backward direction . 
While he was on his way to his office another Sardar saw him and asked 
"Sardar ji aa rahe ho ke jaa rahe ho"......

====================================

Sardar jii, was driveing a car, ke achanak aik Kuttey ka bacha agaya,
Sardar jiii gusey mai garee say uthey aur kutey sey kehney laga,,
tereko pata nhi key tera bappp araha hai
====================

BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3584  Age:  30  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 3:01pm
 

Free Advice

MUFT MASHWRE :


Doodh ager zameen per gir jay to us me se miti alag karle istaymal
ke khabil hojae ga

Ager app k shart me dag lag gayya  hai to foran us shart ko pahena
chor de dag kisi koo nazar nahi ayyga

Cheni hamesha namak k dabbay me rakhe cetiwo  se mahfoz rahe ge

Nath nai bimari say bachne k liya baraf hamesha obal ki use kare

Ager kaproo me zada sufaidi lana hoo to sabun koo wasing powder me
dhoh kar use kare 

Ugly-Sana Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 7  Post: 539  Age:  34  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 3:11pm
 

Beauty Star

So Funny Beauty Star, Really useful advices. Lolllll.... Keep'em up...

BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3584  Age:  30  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 6:16pm
 

Boy and Girl

BOY: TERI JUDAI ME NEEND URTI HAI CHAIN KHOTA 
HAI JAAN JAATI HAI OR DIL ROTA HAI, 


GIRL: DOCTOR KO DIKHA LE BETA Q K DENGI 
VIRUS BHI AISE HI HOTA HAI!. 
BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3584  Age:  30  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 6:16pm
 

Re: Advices

Haan agar app log iss tarah ki advices per amal kartey rahein tou InshaALLAH zindagi pur-sakoon guzrey gee (lol)
ashy Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 50  Post: 383  Age:  36  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 7:45pm
 

bushy joke

George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk, he offers question time.

One little boy puts up his hand and George asked, What is your name?

Bob

And what is your question, Bob?

I have 3 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

Second, why are you president when al gore got more votes?

Third, what happened to Osama bin laden?

Just then, the bell rings for recess.

George bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.

When they resume George says, Ok where were we?

Oh, thats right. Question time. Who has a question?

A different little boy raises his hand.

George points him out and asked him what is your name?

Steve

And what is your question Steve?

I have 5 questions.

First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of UN?

Second, why are you president when Al Gore got more votes?

Third, what happened to Osama bin laden?

Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?

Fifth, where is Bob?
ashy Group: Members  Joined: 18th Aug, 2007  Topic: 50  Post: 383  Age:  36  
Posted on:29th Oct 2007, 7:46pm
 

sardari joke

Sardaarji had twins Named Tin & Martin
Again had twins named Peter & Repeater
Again had twins named Max & Climax
Again had Twins got fedup named Tired & Retired
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