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Pakistani Men 2nd Marriage Kio Nahi Karte?

Social Problem   >>   Culture and Society
 
 
 
 
Bewaqoof Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 264  Post: 4456  Age:  39  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 1:14pm
 

Pakistani Men 2nd Marriage Kio Nahi Karte?

sab jante hai keh Shaadi karna sawab ka kam hai, aur shaadi na karna gunah hai. Islam mai mardo ko char (4) shaadi ki ijazat hai lekin shart yeh hai keh tamam bivio ke sath insaf kia jai. Pakistan mai doosri shaadi se qabal pahli bivi se ijazat lena zaroori hai. mera sawal yeh hai keh.

1. jab shaadi karna sawab ka kam hai tu kia dosri shaadi se double sawab, aur char shaadi se 4 times sawab hoga?

2. Pakistani mard generally doosri shaadi karna nahi chahte. is ki kia wajah hai? Kia woh aik se zaid bivi se insaf ki salahiat nahi rakhte?

3. Pakistani aurtai apne shohar ki doosri bivi ko bardasht nahi karti. is lia doosri shaadi se qabal hi pahli bivi kahti hai keh doosri karni hai tu mujhe talaq do, aur doosri bhi yahi kahti hai keh pahli ko talaq do ge tu phir tum se shaadi karoo gi. kia aurto ka bila wajah aik doosre ko is tarah accept na karna sahi  hai? kia mardo ka bivi ke dabao mai aakar doosri shaadi na karna sahi hai?

4. Kahte hai keh Pakistani culture, Indian culture (hindu) se bahut ziadah mutassir hai, isi lia yaha bhi hindu ki tarah doosri shaadi ka tasawwar nahi hai. kia yeh baat sahi hai. agar nahi tu phir kia sahi hai?

5. Kia Islam mai doosri shaadi se qabal pahli bivi se ijazat leni zaroori hai? agar nahi tu kia Pakistan ka bivi se ijazat lena wala qanoon ghair islami hai. kia ghair islami qanoon ki khilaf warzi gunah hai?

6. agar koi Pakistani mard aik se zaid bivi ke sath insaf karne ki salahiat rakhta ho tu kia ose doosri shaadi kar leni chahia?

7. tamam bivio se insaf se kia murad hai? ham kab kahe ge ke yeh aadmi sahi hai, kio keh yeh apni tamam bivio se insaf kar raha hai.
Ugly-Sana Group: Members  Joined: 02nd Aug, 2007  Topic: 7  Post: 539  Age:  31  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 1:31pm
 

To Bewaqoof

1)      I don't think so. Ke Char shadiyaan karney se zyada sawab ho ga, I'm not sure..

2)      Yes, that is right, Lekin zyada tar Mard dusree shadi ke liye Financially aur Mentally tor par tayar naho hotey, Ar zyada tar who donoo biwiyoon ke haqooq ko pura karney ke barey mein sochtey bhi nahi hain, Humesha eik hi ki taraf Jhukaoo zyada rehta hai. Iss liye to Obviously dusree shadi ki hai.

3)      (a) Yeh Bila Wajah ka Aitraaz to nahi hai Aurotoon ka, Un ki saree zindagi ka sawal hai. E jis insaan par saree zindagi itna trust kar ke apna sab kuch uss ke naam kar diya hai, ab who kiss aur ko apni zindagi mein shamil karney ja raha hai, apna pyar aur sarey haqooq bantney ja raha hai, to Yeh baat koi aurat bhi bardaash nahi kar sakti, Yeh koi chhoti baat ya bila wajah ki zid nahi hai pehli bewi ki. (b) Mardoon ki dusree shadi ussi soorat mein hona behtar hai agar pehli bewi dil se razamandi de, warna, ideally Mard ko dusree shadi nahi karni chahiye.

4)      Iss mein Hindu Culture se Mutassir honey ki baat nahi hai, Eik Aurat ke Jazbaat ki aur uss ke pyar ki baat hai, AUrat chahey Hindu ho Musalmaan ho ay Christian ho Kissi bhi Mulk mein rehti ho kissi bhi mazhab se ho, Koi bhi Aurat apney Shohar ko bantna nahi chahti, (Bilkul ussi tarah, jiss tara mard bhi apni bewi ka kissi aur ke sath tassawur kar hi hi Khoon jalaney lagtey hain).

5)      Ghair Islamic Kanoon ki Khilaf warzi gunah nahi, Illegal ho sakti hai, Aur kissi bhi Islamic kanoon ki Khilaf warzi hi Gunah kehlaye gi. Mujhey nahi pata ke Islam se pehley Bewi se ijazat leney ki ijazat thi ya nahi…

6)      Merey kahayl se uss ke liey bhi koi jayaz wajah honi chahiye, Yanee Aulaad ka na hona, Ya Pehli bewi ki physical condition, ay aur kuchh, Lekin koi socially Acceptable reason to zaroor honi chahiye mard ki dusree shadi ke liye, Yeh nahi ke har dusrey din payr ho jaye, aur Mard shadi hi kartey rahey, Jub tak char shadiyaan nahi ho jatien.

7)      Hum ussi soorat mein uss admi ko sahi kahen gey, ke agar uss ne jayaz wajoohat ki binah par shadiyaan ki hain .Dusra yeh ke who apni tamam bewiyoon ko Financially, Socially, Aur personally tor par equal treat karey. Aur bewiyoon ke sath sath bachoon ke bhi equally tor par haqooq purey Karen.

~~HITMAN~~ Group: Members  Joined: 09th May, 2011  Topic: 122  Post: 4259  Age:  29  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 3:04pm
 

DOSRI SHADI


Interesting topic (kahein bewakoof ka dosri shadi ka irada to nahi)

1. Sirf shadi karnay say hi sawab nahi milta , balkay sawab hasil karnay aur bhi rastay aur tareekay hain. aur shadi sirf sawab k liyain hi nahi ki jaty is k aur bhi variauos makasid hotay hain , maslan shareek safar ki zarorat , parents ki kushi k liyai , koi pasand anay ki waja say .....waghaira waghara

2.  Ye baat ghalat hai ., Pakistani generally dosri shadi bhi kartay hain ,likin app kay sawal k mutabik agar nahi kartay tu is liyain nahi kartay kyun k zindagi buhut fast hogaye hai , is waja say wo jantay hain k dosri shadi un k bas main nahi hai ......ab purana zamana nahi raha

3. Yehi baat agar sab mard apnay upper rakh kar sochay to jo jawab un k zehen main aye ga wohi aurton k zehen main ata hai  ..... maslan agar islam main aurtoon ko bhi is baat ki ijazat hoti k wo 4 shohar rakh sakti hain ek hi wakt main, to phir mardoon k kya ehsasaat hotay jab un ki biwi kisi dosray mard say shadi kar k ghar leyati 

4. Ye baat bhi ghalat hai k hindu say mutasir hokar musalmaan bhi dosri shadi nahi karta ................ sahi baat wohi hai jo upper bataye gaeee hai

5. Agar koi mard dosri shadi ka irada karay tu ye zarori hai k pheli bivi say ijazat lijaye kyun k yehi islami tareeka hai , warna gunah tu nahi hai magar bivi se baghair pochay baat bigar jaye gi aur koi bhi aurat ye bardaasht nahi karay gi ....aur is baat ka ikhtitaam talaak par hosakta hai (yani k bivi say baghair pochay shadi karnay say insaaf wala mamla samnay ajata hai)

6. Pakistani mard 2 biviyon say insaaf ki silahiyat rakhay ya 4 say , bivi say pochay baghair ye kaam nahi karna chahiyai

7. Agar mard ko apni har bivi us say khush nazar ati hai aur kisi bhi nazaryai (chahay wo hokook ka mamla ho ya insaf ka) say usay dekhne k baad wo ussay na khush na lagay to yehi insaaf hai...........


likin aj k zamanay main aesa kuch mumkin nahi hai jesa sawalat mian pocha gaya hai ....ye sab porani zamanay ki kahaniyan hai....

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4647  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 4:01pm
 

mere khayal se

 

1)....i also dont think ke 3 ya 4 shadiyon ka sawab zayada hoga.

aur jis zamane me ye ijazat di gai thi,uski wajah ye thi jung me itni aurtain bewah ho chuki thin.aur aise me isi naiki kaha ja sakta tha.

2)....mera khayal hai pakistani bhi karte hain,han arbon ki nisbat bohat kam hai tadaad.aur jo nahi karte wo financuall problm, ki wajah se hi nahi karte honge.warna kis mard ka dil nahi chahega..... ;)

3)...Hitman apne bohat achi bat ki hai,mard to bardash nahi karte agar unki wife koi dekhe.to.....aur hain isi tarah koi bhi aurat apne husband ko share nahi kar sakti....mai bhi apne husband ko saf saf keh deti hun jab wo mazaak me bhi bat karain to mai yehi kehti hun.mujhe chod do aur phir jo marzi karo...

aur ye mera Haq bhi hai,if i cant do a compromise ,to mai kyoon rahun?

mera bhi yehi khayal hai jaise ke sana ne kaha,agar pehli biwi ijazat de to tab hi mard ko dusri shadi karni chahye

4)...mera nahi khayal ke pakistan is mamle me hindus se mutasir hai...

normaly to hindu mazhab me ek time 2 biwiyan rakhne ki ijazat nahi hai,aur bohat kam hain jinhon ne 2 shadi ki hai.humare to mazhab ne ijazat di hai.

5)...is bare me mai bhi kuch sahi tarah se nahi keh sakti,kyoonke kabhi suna gaya hai ke shohar ke lye biwi se ijazat lena zaroori nahi hia,aur kabhi ye bhi ye ke ijazat zaroori hai

aur agar ijazat zaroori nahi hai to phir bhi leta hai to isme gunaah kyoon hoga?ye to achi bat hai.

6)....maine upar zikar kiya hai ke Hazrat sallela alaihe wa alehi wasallam ne dusri shadi ki ijazat kab di thi aur kyoon.

mera khayal hai dusri shadi ki koi na koi wajah honi chahye..jaise ke agar wife ke kids nahi ho sakte,agar wife bemaar ho,lekin ayashi ke lye iski ijazat nahi hai.

7)insaf rakhne se murad hai,dono biwyon ko ek jitna time de,agar ek biwi ke pas 1 week raha to dusri ke sath bhi ek week rahe,isi taraf financially....aur jo insaf nahi karega wo Gunehgaar hoga.

aur humare pyare nabi ne bhi kaha hai ye lazmi hai ke mard ka ek aurat ki taraf jhukao zyada hota hai,islye agar tum insaf kar sako to dusri shadi karo

 

josh Group: Members  Joined: 30th Jul, 2007  Topic: 47  Post: 2285  Age:  37  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 4:55pm
 

Shadi ki Batain!

1-Mard ko 4 shadi allow hai ismai koi shak nai or iskay liye bv say ijazat ki zaroorat nai, bcoz Allah nay ijazat day di hai. or sunnat bi hai or kisi bi sunnat par amal karna sawab ka kaam hai... to koi bi aisa insan jo kisi bi waja say 1 say ziada shadi karna chahta hai or wo financially theek hai or sab ka acha khayal rakh sakta hai to shadi karnay mai koi harj nai. or shadi k liye agar koi bewa ya yateem larki dekhta hai to or ziada sawab ka kam , bcoz ho sakta hai us larki ki shadi j.haiz waghaira ki waja say na ho rahi ho...

2-ajkal ka Mard financial problems ki waja say ziada shadi nai karta or dosra pehli bv ka bi darr hota hai.

3-orto ka aisa kehna k pehlay muje talak do phir shadi karo, ye galat hai. unko aisay nai karna chahiye.

7-i think ye point bohat important hai or mukhtalif logo ki different opinion hogi..shayed sana nay theek bataya hai financially socially and personally sab ka khayal rakh sakay. ye na ho k dosri shadi kar k pehli say jan chhuranay lag jaey uska khayal na rakhay.

Hitman: 3-agar orton ko shadi ka haq hota hi kyon,, orto ko 1 say ziada mard rakhny ki ijazat hi nahi to agar magar ka sawal hi nai.. balkay merey khayal say apnay bohat bari bat kardi or mard ko 4 shadi ki ijazat ko hi challenge kar dia hai.
5-ap kehty ho zarori hai pehli bv say IJAZAT lay bcoz yehi islami tareka hai, sath ye bi kehty ho k ijazat na lay to gunah nai, kuch samajh nai aya ??bcoz islami tareekay k khilaf jana to gunah ka kaam hota hai,,ho sakay to koi Quranic reference day dain jahan likha ho k bv say ijazat lena zaroori hai.
Sunehri: insan waja k baghair shadi nai karta, har insan k pas shadi ki koi na koi waja hoti hai..or apko ye bi pata hoga k hamary nabi ko bi apni bevion mai ziada mohabbat hazrat ayesha say thi.. mohabbat insan k ikhtiar mai nahi hai, koi insan apni kisi bi waja say ziada pyara lagnay lagta hai,, to ab ye limitations nahi lagain ja sakti k 1 bv k pas 2 ghantay raha hai to dosri k pas bi 2 ghantay hi rahay warna gunah hoga... aisi koi bat nai hai.

Puranay zamany ki baton yani Quran majeed or Hadith ko galat nai kaha ja sakta..

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4647  Age:  38  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 5:08pm
 

josh

josh

barabri ka matlab hai ke donon ke sath ek jaisa salook karo..is me ye bhi a jata hai.... ke ye ek jaisa salook nahi hai agar ek admi ek biwi ke pas 4 week guzare islye kyunke us se wo zyada Mhbt hai aur dusri jis se kam Mhbt hai us ke pas 1 week guzare...ye nainsafi hai.aur jo aisa nahi karta wo gunehgar hai islye kyunke khuda ka hukam hai agar tum barabri kar sakte ho to 2 shadi karo ...aur  2 shadi ki koi wajah bhi honi chahye

@JOSH

apki bat thik hai ke Muhabbat insan ke ikhteyar me nahi hoti,lekin insan ka salook to uske ikhteyar me hota hai.

~~HITMAN~~ Group: Members  Joined: 09th May, 2011  Topic: 122  Post: 4259  Age:  29  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 8:18pm
 

Hosh say parho Josh

josh , main nay ek baat kahi hai , mujhe pata hai aesa kuch nahi hai , tum ye baat agar apnay upper rakh kar socho ........balkay mujhe ye khena chahiyai tha k kuch dair k liyain apnay app ko wo aurat samjho jis ki ijazat k baghair shohar dosri shadi karnay jaraha hai,ab tum ye batao tumhara kya faisla hoga ??????kyun aurton main naturaly toor say jealously hoti hai dosri aurton kay khilaaf aur jesa k sunehri nay kaha k koi aurat apna shohar share hotay nahi dekh sakti ...... wo aurtain buhut mushkil say milagy jo ijazat dain....ajkal k zamanay main aesi koi aurat nahi hai jo apnay shuhur ki dosri shadi say khush hojae , balkay bivi tu shohar k parents ko bhi pasand nahi karti hai

JOSH BHAI app ki dosri baat ka jawab ye hai k agar mard ko jab islam ki taraf say 4 shadiyon ki ijazat hai to phir us ko apni bivi say ijazat lenay ki zarorat hi nahi but agar wo apni phele biwi say ijazat lay kar shadi karay (yani us ko mana kar, pyaar say samjha kar , ek achay tareekay say bata kar) to yai ek islamic point of view say  achi baat hoye ya nahi........kyun k islam hamain peace sikhata tha aur bhai charay say rehna sikhata hai ....na k laraiii jhagra ,aur is tarha app buhut si cheezon say bach jayeen ge ,maslan talaq, bachon k sir say baap ka saya uthna waghaira , aur islam main talak dena ek acha amal nahi hai......KYA KHAYAL HAI
Prozak Group: Members  Joined: 06th Jul, 2007  Topic: 0  Post: 81  Age:  44  
Posted on:19th Sep 2007, 10:45pm
 

Well Gentlemen

Aoa.

i read whole question of Bawkoof sahib and i wud only say our culture is v.much inspired by Indian and English culture. girls dont know how to even live making home heavinly and bearing 2nd wife of husband is for "MOMIN" girls not for our culturel girl who is deeegrading her self day by day for money and getting away away from Islam and Blessed teachings of Hadrat Mohammad SAW.  as some ladies mentioned one girl give every thing to man and how can she accept other one. Look upon the Life of our Holy prophit's wives and after that other personnels wives who lived happily and it is In Hadith  " aurat kay hath main Money ke luck hoti hain and Aulaad mard kay hath main "  if we follow rules of our Holy religion and dont try to get involve in ugly n bad habits we wud be more prosper.  our immage wud be way way better than now.    if men are not doing in Pakistan that's why ZANA is promoting ever where in every city .. and why they are not doing because their wives are not pious  they become bitches so Gentlemen avoid it . . .

get the % of zana today and 10 years b4 then 20 years b4 .. today with all education and facilities our nation is in worse situation just because they became materilistic. Men .. women ..kidz . boys .. girls every one forget their religion.. so these are the fruits every one having.. not quite. every one is disturbed.. under pressure.. mently disturbed. stressed ..depressed..

May God bless our Nation..

ONE IMPORTANT THING

Aoa..

GEntlemen there is no condation in Islam to get permission from ist wife for other marriage.. Plz point to be noted this was ammended in FamilyLaws in 1962 when Gen Ayub was president of Pakistan. But there is no Evidence if it is in Islam..

BeautyStar Group: Members  Joined: 16th May, 2007  Topic: 52  Post: 3586  Age:  27  
Posted on:20th Sep 2007, 4:46am
 

Pakistani Men 2nd Marriage Kyun Nahi Karte . . ?

Jaise kah app ko pata hoga kah ISLAM eak wahid mazhab hai jiss maiyn 1 se zayadah biwiyaan rakhey ja sakhtey hain woh bhi eak waqt maiyn matlab yah kah ek mard char aurtoon se shadi kar sakhtah hai lekin ISLAM ne iss per buhat sarey restrictions bhi ompose ki hain sirf PYAR ka har jiss ma barabrey ka sulook kiya jaey tamam biwion maiyn warna akhrat maiyn uss shaqks ki pakard hogee . Logically bhi agar dekh jaisey tou whole world maiyn mard ur aurat ka ratio approx 1:3 ka hai iss ka matlab yah hai kah agar har shakhs 2 shadi bhi karta hai tou buhat sarey girls ghalat kamoon ma involve hi nahi hoon gee . . . Sirf INDIA woh wahid country hai jiss maiyn yah ratio approx. 1:1 hai research ka mutabiq yah iss liyah hai kyun kah wahan larkioon ko ajj bhi [aidah hote hi dafan kar diyah jatah hai yah phir un ko rape kar k maar daalah jatah hai .

Abb app ka question ki tarah aatey hain one by one :

(1) Shaadi karna beeshak sawab ka kaam hai aur 4 shaadi per 4 times sawab miley ga magar uss se kaey zayadah gunah app ko uss waqt milaey ga jab app tamam bivion ma barabrey nahi kar sakein aur ajj kal k daur maiyn tou 1 mard ur aurat eak dosrey k hi haqooq adah nahi karte tou dosrey or teesrey ka tou sawal hi nahi uthtah hai

(2) Pakitani mard eak se zayadah larkion se flirt ka sakhtey hain magar shadi nahi kyun kah girl friends ka koi kaqooq nahi hotey magar bivi ka buhat sarey haqooq hotey hain or husband per buht zarey zimadarian jo kah woh uthaney se darta hai or dosrey BIVI or uss ka ghar waloon ki taraf se bhi buhat pressure hota hai or woh shohar thorah sa darr jatah hai

(3) Pakistani nahi balkah duniyah bhar ki aurtein dosrey aurat ko abb bardaasht nahi kartey hain or talaaq ka mutalbah kartey hain plus compensation bhi claim karte hain . . . Pakistani aurat ko tou yah bilkul bhi baardasht nahi hotah hai even mazakh maiyn bhi yah baat sunna gawarah nahi kartein hain . . . Mard kahim hai aurat mahkoom mard jab chahaey jo chahae kar sakhtah hai iss liyah mard kisi dbaoo maiyn nahi hotah hai blkah woh Insaaf karne se bhaagth hai or Zimdariyoon se bhagtah hai bas aur koi wajah nahi hai

(4) Jee beshak donon ka culture ek dosrey maiyn rach bas gaey hain shayad iss wajah se Pakistan wajood maiyn ayah tha ho sakhtah hai loog isi wajah se dosrey shadi ko mayoob samajhtey hain magar karney waley kartey hain aur jo karte hain woh INSAAF per qaim nahi rehtey sirf Sexual Gratification k liyah hi kartey hain ya phir donon ma se koi eak DOOLAT ki lalach maiyn hota hai

(5) Islam ne bivi ki ijazt ka kaha hai lekin agar bivi inkr kardey tou phir mard ko ikhtiyaar hasil hai chahey woh karey dosrey shadi ya na karey aur yah koi qanoon nahi hai bas eak tarah se samajh lein kah formality hai hota tou wohi hai jo mard chahatah hai

(6) Agar koi yah mard samajhtah hai kah woh tamam bivion maiyn Barabrey karey ga or Insaaf per kaim rahey ga tou dosrey shadi karney maiyn koi harjh nahi hai balkah swab ka kaam hai aur acha hai buhat sarey larkian jo gair shadi shudah ho kar masturbation aur zina wagaiarh maiyn involve hai uss se tou acha hai kah kisi ghar ki izzat ban jaein dosre hi sahi bivi tou kahlein gee na warna bagair shadi ka yah sab karne waliyoon ko maashrah kya naam deta hai woh khudh behter jaantein hain

(7) Tamam bivion se insaaf ka matlab yah hai kah har cheez maiyn barabrey honey chahiayah agar eak ko 1000 wala kaprh dilaey tou dosre ko bhi eak ko flat dey tou dosrey ko bhi wisa hi flat dey eak ko restaurant maiyn kheley tou dosrey ko bhi eak ke saath 1 porn din guzarey tou dosra din dosrey wali bivi ka saath guzarey gharz yah kah har cheez maiyn barabrey karey albattah iss baat per chooth dey gaey hai kah eak ko dil maiyn zyadh psnd ur pyr karta hoon aur dosrey ko kam Iss per ISLAM ne bhi dheel dey hai

These are the answers to the best of my knowledge and experience .

Take care . . . ALLAH Hafiz !!!
Kali Zuban Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 29  Post: 1792  Age:  29  
Posted on:20th Sep 2007, 12:07pm
 

Pakistani mardo ki doosri shaadi

1. shaadi karna aur aik se zaid shaadi karna sunnat hai. sunnat par amal karna sawab ka kam hai.

2. Pakistani mard na tu bivi se darte hai aur na hi apni bivio se na-insafi karte hai. shaadi na karne ki asal wajah culture ko follow karna hai. Pakistani culture mai doosri shaadi allow nahi hai. is lia Pakistani mard na doosri shaadi karte hai aur na hi karne ko zahni tor se tayyar hai.

3. Pakistani aurto ka apne shohar ki doosri bivi ko bardasht na karna, cultural point of view se theek hai. lekin doosri ki wajah se talaq lena ya talaq dilwana ghalat hai. yeh amal ghair islami hai aur gunah bhi.

4. ji ha yeh baat theek hai. jo log hindu culture se ziadah mutasir hai woh doosri shaadi ki mukhalfat karte hai. warna jo log sirf Islamic culture ko follow karte hai woh doosri shaadi ki mukhalfat nahi karte. balke doosri shaadi ki sunnat par amal bhi karte hai.

5. Islam mai doosri shaadi ke lia pahli bivi se ijazat leni zaroori nahi. agar ijazat ke beghair shaadi kar li tu koi gunah nahi. lekin pakistan ke qanoon ke mutabiq ijazat leni zaroori hai. state ke qanoon ki khilaf warzi gunah tu nahi lekin jurm zaroor hai. lehaza Pakistani mardo par lazim hai keh doosri shaadi se qabal pahli bivi se ijazat le.

6. bilkul kar leni chahia. lekin Pakistan mai bivi se ijazat le kar. bivi se ijazat lene ke lia bivi par kisi qisim ka dabao dalna gunah hai.

7. allah aur allah ke rasool ko bhi maloom hai keh aik mard tamam bivio ko aik nigah se nahi dekh sakta. Huzoor (PBUH) ko bhi apni tamam bivio mai Hazrat Aisha (R) bahut piari thi. lehaza hukum hai keh aik ki wajah se doosri ko bilkul nazar andaz na koro. yani thori bahut nazar andaz karna gunah nahi hai.
hopeful Group: Members  Joined: 14th May, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 20  Age:  34  
Posted on:21st Sep 2007, 2:06pm
 

zara sochain

   Aiktaraf aap log kehtey ho k Islam may doosri shaadi k leiy bivi ki ijazat ki zaroorat nahi, doosri taraf kehtey ho k Islam may bivioon kay saath insaaf karna zaroori hai.Sab se pehli nainsaafi tu is ki ijazat kay beghair shaadi kerna ho gi.Agar aap pehley us ko dukh dey ker shaadi karo ge tu agay kia khaak bivioon may insaaf karo ge .

Aap log Prophet[s.a.w] ki misaaldetey ho tu sunnah per saheeh tareeqay se amul bhi karo. Prophet[s.a.w] ne ziada ter baiwa aurtoon se shaadi ki.Aj kal log ayyashi key leiy shaadi kerty hain,sawab ke leiy nahi.hur murd chahta hai k usay pehli bivi se ziada beautiful aur young bivi milay.

Arab ki misaal aap logo ne di k wo ziada shaadian  kerty hain ,magar wo tu bachoon wali aurat say bhi shaadi ker lety hain.Hamari society may kitney murd aise aurat se sawab k leiy shaadi kerty hain.

Aksar murd tu aik shaadi ka haq ada nahi ker saktey ,in ko aik shaadi ka bhi haq nahi milna chahiey.

Murd 4 shaadi ko apna Islamic right jatata hai magar asal huqm ko pas e pusht dal deta hai Allah ne jahan 4 shaadi ki ijazat di ,waheen yeh bhi farma dia k tum bivioon may adal nahi ker pao ge.

Islamic huqm ko apply kerne se pehley is ki asal hikmat ko samajhna zaroori hai.jaise Hajj sub per farz hai magar hur koi nahi ker sakta isi tarah hur murrd 4 shaadi ki responsibility nahi utha sakta ,is ka hosla kum murdoon mai hota hai.

sunehri76 Group: Members  Joined: 04th Aug, 2007  Topic: 100  Post: 4647  Age:  38  
Posted on:21st Sep 2007, 2:42pm
 

@hopefull

i agree to u..and want to continue,..ke humare prophet ne apne se 25 sal badi aurat se bhi shadi ki thi,jabke sab mard dusri shadi karna to sunnat samajhte hain par unko ye khayal nahi rehta ke humare nabi ne apni umar se badi aurat se bhi shadi ki thi.

ghar me bhi jab ye topic chalta hai to sab misalain dete hain humare nabi ki,ke sunnat hai,to mai yehi kehti hun to kisi badi umar ki aurat se ya bewah ya bachon wali se karain shadi...tab sawaab ki bat karain

 

Kali Zuban Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 29  Post: 1792  Age:  29  
Posted on:21st Sep 2007, 10:42pm
 

re: hopful & sunehri

1. bivi se insaf ka bivi se ijazat ka koi taluq nahi. na Quran mai aur na hi Hadeth mai bivi se ijazat lena likha hai. lehaza bivi se ijazat ke beghair shaadi bivi se na-insafi nahi.

2. doosri shaadi ki kai wajoohat hote hai. jis mai sab se aham wajah pahli bivi ka shohar ke sath na-munasib rawayya hota hai.

agar pahli bivi shohar ke liye singhar na kare, shohar ka doosre mamla mai proper khial na kare, shohar ko mijazi khuda na mane aur apni ma aur bahan ko shohar se ziadah ahmiat de, zuban darazi kare, shohar ke haqooq proper tareeqa se ada na kare tu aksar mard doosri aurto ki taraf raghib hone lagte hai.

jo log chup kar doosri shaadi karte hai agar on ki history li jai tu yahi pata chalta hai keh doosri bivi ne apne banao singhar, khoosh ikhlaqi, khoosh mizaji ki madad se mard ko apni taraf raghib kar ke shaadi ki hai. mera kahna hai keh agar pahli bivi bhi apne shohar ke lia banao singhar karti, aur os ke haqooq ada karti tu wo doosri aurat se attract nahi hota. doosri shaadi ki wajoohat mai ziadah tar qasoor pahli bivi ka hota hai.

3. Huzoor (PBUH) ne na sirf bewa aur bari age ki khawateen se shaadi ki balkeh kunwari nojawan larkio se bhi shaadi ki. onho ne 56 years ki age mai 9 years ki larki Hazrat Ayesha (R) se bhi shaadi ki hai. Huzoor (PBUH) ke inteqal 63 years ke waqt hazrat Ayesha (R) ki age 16 years thi. lehaza agar koi aadmi young larki se shaadi karta hai tu woh bhi sunnat par amal karta hai.

4. Pakistani culture mai tu doosri shaadi ka rewaj nahi hai. albatta jo log doosri shaadi karte hai woh bachche wali aurto se bhi karte hai. ap ne aksar aik ya do bachcho wali bewa aur mutlaqa khawateen ki shaadi ka suna ho ga. zahir hai mard bachche wali aurto se shaadi karte hai tab hi tu in ki shaadi hoti hai.

5. aap ne wazahat nahi ki keh aap kis qisim ke mardo ki baat kar rahe hai jo aik bivi ka bhi haq ada nahi kar sakte. agar aap financialy ghareeb logo ki baat kar rahe hai tu phir aap ghalat bat kar rahe hai. ghareeb logo ko shaadi ka bhi poora poora haq hasil hai. agar aap na-mard ki baat kar rahe hai tu shaadi se qabal yeh nahi maloom kia ja sakta keh yeh shakhs na-mard hai. lehaza aap ke yeh kahna keh kuch mardo ko shaadi ka haq nahi hona chahia bilkul ghalat hai.

5. allah aur os ke rasool ne saaf saaf lafzo mai kaha hai keh mard ke lia mumkin hai keh woh tamam bivio ko barabar nazro se dekhe. is lia hukum hai keh aik ki wajah se doosri ko bilkul nazar andaz na karo. yani islam mai aik ki wajah se doosri ko thora nazar andaz karne ki ijazat hai. aur yeh gunah bhi nahi hai.

6. ji ha hamare country mai 4 shaadi ki hikmat ko koi samajhne ko tayyar nahi. isi lia Pakistan mai lakho larkia shaadi ke beghair boorhi ho gai. aur agar koi aurat bechari bewa ya mutlaqa ho gai tu beshtar aurto ko shaadi ke beghair baqia zindagi guzarni parti hai. agar Pakistni allah ki 4 shaadi ki ahmiat ko samajhte tu aaj pakistan mai koi bhi aurat shohar ke beghair nazar nahi aati.

re: sunehri76
hamare mulk mai bhi aise beshumar mard mojood hai jo ke old age khatoon se shaadi ko tayyar hai. akhbar mai aise ishteharat chapte rahte hai.
faisee Group: Active Members  Joined: 13th Feb, 2007  Topic: 78  Post: 773  Age:  31  
Posted on:21st Sep 2007, 11:00pm
 

Re: Kali Zuban

aap ki beshtar batain durust aur halat kai taqazon kai mutabiq hain. main aap kai khayalat sai agree karta hoon. aur acha laga kai aap nai aik aurat hotay hue bhi realities ko samnay rakh kar baat ki hai.

baqi bhi kisi na kisi context main sahee baat kar rahay hain.

RE: kali zuban:  2nd marriage: yahan main aik aur baat kahoon ga kai shadi aik aisa rishta hai kai koi bhi piyar karnay wala apnay spouse ko share nahin kar sakta. yeh aik natural si baat hai. jab donon hi khush hon har tarah sai yani kisi qism ka koi problem na ho life main tu koi bhi 2nd marriage nahin karta. either its paksitan or anywhere else.

so jis tarah Sana nai bataya hai, agar really koi problem nahin aur na hi kisi ki help karnay ka purpose hai. tu aik larki/aurat kai nuqta-e-nazar sai Sana kai saray points ko valid samajhta hoon.

josh Group: Members  Joined: 30th Jul, 2007  Topic: 47  Post: 2285  Age:  37  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 9:44am
 

mazeed batain!

kali zuban ki yehi to khas bat hai k ye reality par believe karti hain or deeni masael mai ziada tar wohi baat kehnay ki koshish karti hain jo Quran or hadith mai likha ho,, baat mard or orat ki nahi hai, bat hai sach ki... or ab ye bi dekhain k yaha par bohat say mard hazraat bi 1 say ziada shadi k khilaf likh rahay hain..
koi bi insan 2nd marriage karta hai to uski koi na koi waja hoti hai jiska zikar kali zuban nay kia hai or bi bohat si wajoohat ho sakti hain or koi un wajoohat ko challenge nai kar sakta, Mujhe to ye pata hai k husband, bv ka mijazi khuda hai. or jo orat uski bat nai manti wo gunahgar hai.to is hisab say agar husband chahta hai k dosri shadi karay to bv ko is waja say laraee waghaira nai karna chahiye, or agar husband bazid ho to bv ko maan lena chahiye.. Allah to ye bi kehta hai k agar husband bv say pyar/mohabbat karna chahye or bv inkar kar day to wo bi gunah hai,, ab ap log ismai bi apnay dimagh say soch soch kar hazaron points nikal saktay hain k ji orat ki feelings orat ka khayal etcetc. lekin mai yehi kahonga k jo bat saf saf bata di gaee hai wohi sahi hai..
or faisee ap sana ka saray points ko pata nai kis hisab say valid keh rahay ho. mera khayal hai k ap dono k khayalat bohat miltay hain.. 
sana says "mard bhi apni bewi ka kissi aur ke sath tassawur kar k hi Khoon jalaney lagtey hain" , , agar bv ka kisi or say relation hoga to khoon to jalay ga or orat ko 1 time par 1 hi shadi ki ijazat hai agar wo ziada ka sochti hai to wo intahaee gunahgar hai.. jabkay mard 1 bv k hotay huey dosri shadi ka sochta hai to koi gunah nahi...
farz kia aik mard apni bv ko pasand nai karta , kisi bi waja say , or is waja say wo bahir koi girlfriend bana leta hai or najaez talukaat bana leta hai gunah kabeera bi ho jata hai ,,, to is say behtar ye nai k mard ko ijazat ho or wo shadi kar lay or khud bi gunah say bachay or jis larki ko gunah mai shamil kar lia us say shadi kar k usay bi gunah say bacha lay..

sana apki post ki 6th point mai jo bat hai, muje achi lagi or hansi bi aee "Yeh nahi ke har dusrey din payr ho jaye, aur Mard shadi hi kartey rahey, Jub tak char shadiyaan nahi ho jatien."

faisee as u said:"shadi aik aisa rishta hai kai koi bhi piyar karnay wala apnay spouse ko share nahin kar sakta.",, to phir Muhammad (SAW) nay jo shadia ki wo kia thin??
THEN u said "jab donon hi khush hon har tarah sai yani kisi qism ka koi problem na ho life main tu koi bhi 2nd marriage nahin karta", to phir Muhammad (SAW) nay jo shadia ki unko ap kia kaho gay???
hopeful: jo sach hai wo to sachi hi hai, 4 shadi allow hai,, or Allah tala janta hai k insan puri tara insaf nai kar paey ga, phir bi shadio ki ijazat di hai, bcoz thori bohat galti ho bi gaee to wo Allah tala apni rehmat say maaf farma daingay.

umar90 Group: Members  Joined: 14th Sep, 2007  Topic: 1  Post: 9  Age:  24  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 1:11pm
 

uncle ki dosri shadi

mayray ek reletives main hain jin hone do shadiyan kein ammy kisi ko bata rahi theen  un ka koi baccha nahi tha aur wo buhat baray bhi ho gaye thay un ko bachay ka buhat shouq tha tu un ho nay shadi kar li lekin ab pehle wali aunty apne bhai kay pas rehti hain aur un se milne kabhi kabhi ati hain . or un uncle ke bachy bhi ho gaye . lekin sab afsos kerte hain aye haye wo pehlay wali aunty bechari kion chali gain .

ye hain tu baro ki batain lekin wese hi bata raha hon .( bhaiyon koi english tu sikhao mayra aj ka time khatm hone wala hay net ka kisi ko pata chala tu kaccha chaba jaye ga is site per dekh kay )

hopeful Group: Members  Joined: 14th May, 2007  Topic: 4  Post: 20  Age:  34  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 2:15pm
 

re.kali zuban

 Hazrat Ali ne Prophet[s.a.w] ki zindagi may doosri shaadi nahi ki, k Hazrat Fatima ke walid hone ki haisiat se Aap[s.a.w] ko taqleef ho gi.Its a fact k aurat khooshi se doosri aurat ko qabool nahi kerty.

 ye baat sirf aurat tuk mehdood nahi rehty. aksar dekha gia hai k bachaay bhi apne walid k khilaaf ho jate hain,jub wo doosri shaadi kerta hai.

meray kehney ka maqsad sirf ye tha ke 4 shaadi kerna jaiz zaroor hai ,mager sukht restrictions ke saath.her mard in ahqamaat ko poora kerne ki salahiat nahi rakhta.

me ne kaha tha k kuch mard aik shaadi ka haq bhi ada nahi kertey. is ka matlab hai k wo aurat se acha solook nahi kertey,aisay mard jab 4 shaadi kery gay tu 4 aurtoon se ziadity kare ge.

Kali Zuban Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 29  Post: 1792  Age:  29  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 6:51pm
 

re: hopeful

1. aap ke nazdeek Prophet (PBUH) ki ahmiat ziadah hai ya Hazrat Ali (R) ki? agar hamare prophet (pbuh) ne aike bivi ki mojoodgi mai doosri shaadi ki tu phir kisi qisim ke objection karne ya ikhtelafi bian dene ki ijazat nahi.

2. doosri shaadi mai aurat ki ijazat ki koi zaroorat nahi. lehaza is se koi gharz nahi keh aurat doosri shaadi se khoosh hai keh nahi. Allah aur Rasool ka hukum hai keh aik bivi ki wajah se doosri ko bilkul nazar andaz na karo. yani thora bahut nazar andaz karna allow hai.

3. agar meri koi bhi baat Quran aur Sunnat ke khilaf ho tu baraye meharbani mustanad reference se os ki tasheeh kare. apni taraf se koi zati comments na de. deen ki baato mai zati comments aur ikhtelafi bian dena gunah hai.
faisee Group: Active Members  Joined: 13th Feb, 2007  Topic: 78  Post: 773  Age:  31  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 7:11pm
 

Re: Kali Zuban

Kali jee, jab islam kisi baat ki azadi deta hai tu phir bat personal interest ki a jatee hai. aap batain, as a married women of this society, aap kisi aurat ko as a sokan bardasht karain gi? I am not getting personal, but just to know about your view personally. because islam nai ijazat di hai woh bhi condition kai saath kai donon kai saath barabar ka salook kia jaye. sawal ka jawab zaroor dijiye ga.

josh: hamaray nabi (SAW) nai tu 11 marriages ki theen, 4 nahin. jab kai ham tu sirf 4 kar saktay hain, ham 11 kion nahin kar saktay (nauzubillah). main nai pehlay bhi kaha kai agar koi naik maqsad manzoor hai tu phir bismillah. otherwise apni baqi responsibilites bhula kar sirf 4 shadion kai shoq main shadian kartay rehna koi naik kaam nahin. aur aik kamyab life kai liye 4 shadian hi zaroori nahin hai, aur bhi buhut si batain dekhni partee hain jo kai culture aur society ka hissa hain. culture logon sai banta hai aur logon kai huqooq ko huqooqul ibad kaha jata hai un ko bhi poora karna hota hai. agar gaur kia jaye tu samajh main ata hai kai sirf shadi ka sawab lai kar huqooq pooray na karnay ka gunah ziada bara ho jaye ga.

main kalizuban sai agree karta hoon kai aaj agar mard un aurton sai shadi karna shuru kar dain jo kai shadi kai intezar main jawani paar kar rahee hain tu un ki life bhi ban jaye gi aur buryaon kai khatmay main bhi madad milay gi.

isi liye tu main kehta tha kai main nai tu aik per rukna nahin, 4 aik saath karni hain, tu kali jee naraz hotee theen :)

thanks
Kali Zuban Group: Members  Joined: 19th Sep, 2010  Topic: 29  Post: 1792  Age:  29  
Posted on:22nd Sep 2007, 8:05pm
 

re: faisee

1. mai aik pakistani khatoon hoo; pakistani khatoon ke zehan mai yeh baat dal di gai hai keh kisi aur aurat ko bator sokan bardashat na karna. lehaza mai kisi bhi aurat ko bator sokan bardasht nahi kar sakti. lekin yeh meri zati khahish hai. yeh deen nahi. zati khahish aur deen mai farq hai. ham zati khahish ki khatir deen ke khilaf bian nahi de sakte.

2. jis tarah log nimaz nahi parhte, roza nahi rakht aur aisa na karne ke das bahane dhoondte hai. lekin ap nimaz aur roza ke khilaf yeh nahi kah sakte keh nimaz parhna aur roza rakhna ghalat hai. isi tarah agar mai apne shohar ki doosri bivi ko bardasht nahi karti tu yeh mera zati fel hai. is ka yeh matlab nahi keh mere shohar ne koi ghair islami harkat ki hai aur woh gunah gar hai.

3. Islam ne sirf aik condition lagai hai keh aik ki khatir doosri ko bilkul nazar andaz na kardo. yani thora bahut nazar andaz karna gunah nahi hai. tamam bivio ke sath bilkul barabri ka salook karne ka kahi hukum nahi hai. balkeh Quran aur Hadeh mai wazeh tor par bataya gia hai keh aik mard apni tamam bivio ko aik nigah se nahi dekh sakta. kisi se ziadah muhabbat ho gi aur kisi se kam. lehaza aik bivi ke muqabla mai doosri bivi se ziadah muhabbat karna gunah nahi. Huzoor (PBUH) ko bhi Hazrat Aisha (R), doosri bivio se ziadah aziz thi.

4. chukeh hamare culture mai aik aurat doosri aurat ko bator sokan qabool karne ko tayyar nahi (jo keh ghair sharyee harkat hai), is lia mera opinion hai keh pakistan mai mard ko aik waqt mai aik hi shaadi karni chahia. lekin mera yeh opinion cultural point of view se hai deeni point of view se nahi. jaisa ke main ne pahle kisi post par kaha tha rukhsati se qabal mubasrat culturally allow nahi hai lekin mubasrat karne se gunah bhi nahi hoga.

5. mera zati khial hai keh agar hamare culture hindu culture se mutasir hone ki bajai pure islamic culture hota (jaisa ke saoodi arab mai hai) tu pahli bivi doosri bivi ko na sirf bardasht karti balke khood hi larki dhoond kar apne shohar ki doosri shaadi karti. hamre mulk mai bhi molvi hazrat aik se ziadah shaadi karte hai aur on ki bivia bhi sath rahti hai.
 
 
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