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Eik larki umar ki kis had tak pohanch jaey to mature samjhi jati hai?

Religion and Culture
 
 
aiki Group: Members  Joined: 03rd Apr, 2009  Topic: 12  Post: 84  Age:  27  
Posted on:13th Feb 2017, 11:46pm
 

Eik larki umar ki kis had tak pohanch jaey to mature samjhi jati hai?

Hamarey han aksar gharon mein ye kaha aur suna jata hai k larkian larko k muqabley jald mature ho jati hain. Marey questions bhi kuch isi mozo se mutaliq hain…Hopefully members will give their opinion…

Q-1: First of all to mein ye pochna chahta hon k eik insan mein maturity honey se kia murad hai? ya level of maturity kisey kehty hain? aur jab ye baat ghar mein ki jati hai specially walida ki taraf se to is ka kia matlab ho ga kyon k aksar gharon mein behan bhaiyon ki umron mein 2, 3 saal ka hi farq hota hai aur ye bhi dekha gya hai k behan ko umar mein kam honey k bawjood mature samjha jata hai?

Q-2: eik larki umar ki kis had tak pohanch jaey to mature samjhi jati hai aur kia uska mature hona aqally aietbar se hai ya is aitbar se k wo shadi k qabil ho gai hai?

Q-3: Agar mature hona shadi k aitbar se hai to eik larki kis umar mein shadi k qabil ho jati hai? Ye sawal is liye bhi ziada eham hai kyon k (marey ilam k mutabiq) government ney 18 saal se kam umar larkey larki ki shadi pey pabandi laga rakhi hai?

Q-4:  Hamari society mein larkian laron se pehley jawan ho jati hain to kia unki shadi qanoonan juram tasawar ki jaey gi according to law?

Q-:5 Eik larki jis ki umar 18 saal se kam ho kia shadi se mutaliq jumla zimma dariyan ba-ahsen-e-khobi ada ker sakti hai? Ye dekha gaya hai k insan is umar mein apni body se mutaliq kafi sensitive hota hai…

Q-6: Generally, larkian apni shadi se pehley apney honey waley life partner k baray mein kia soch rakhti hain? kia wo larkon ki tarah physical appearance se mutasir hoti hain? aksar ye observe kia gia hai k jab rishtey ki baat chalti hai aur mukhtalif parties ka ana jana shroo hota hai to larkian post discussion personality k oper karti hain…

Q-7: Eik aur baat jo kafi observe ki gai hai k hamari society mein larkey ki umar larki se ziada hoti hai, aur isey behtar khyaal kia jata hai is ki waja kia hai?

Q-8: larkey aur larki ka kitna age difference shariat aur mental understanding k lehaz se behtar hai?

Q-9: eik kam umar larki shadi se pehley azdwaji mamlat k baray mein kitna ilam rakhti hai? Hamari society mein aksar khawateen ko is baat ka ilam nahi hota to kia ghar mein ye ilam maan provide karti hai ye degar qareebi rishta dar?

Q-10: Amoman ye bhi observe kia gia hai k hamrey gaaon dehaton mein matric k bad hi larki ki shadi ker di jati hai to kia aisi larki level of maturity ko pohanch chuki hoti hai?

Q-11: kia shadi se pehly larki ko ye bataya jata hai k shadi k bad usey kis tarah khawand se tawun karna hai ya k ye shohar ki zimmadari hai k wo larki ko educate karey?

Q-12: isi tarah jaheiz ki tayariyon k doran ‘’nala paranda’’ ki istalah use ki jati hai. Is mein kon kon si ashiya shamil hain?  

Q-13: kin baton ya signs se larki ki pasandeedgi ka (kisi rishtey k hawaley se) andaza lagaya ja sakta hai? 

aiki Group: Members  Joined: 03rd Apr, 2009  Topic: 12  Post: 84  Age:  27  
Posted on:9th Mar 2017, 11:42pm
 

Reminder

Kafi din guzar gaye magar kisi senior member ney meray questions ko address nai kiya....Atleast moderators hazrat jo is post ko oobserve kr rahey hain ko to relply karna chahiye tha...Writing in hope to get some answers...
Activist Group: Members  Joined: 04th Feb, 2012  Topic: 13  Post: 395  Age:  27  
Posted on:11th Mar 2017, 12:17pm
 

too many questions

ap ne bht ziada sawal kiye hain is wja se kisi ne jawab nai diaa. hmain paisay to milte nahi ha jawab dene k to jb dil krta hai de dete hai. jb nai krta to ignore. I will try to answer as I will get more free time
bushra2012 Group: Members  Joined: 15th Oct, 2013  Topic: 1  Post: 1787  Age:  80  
Posted on:12th Mar 2017, 3:13pm
 

username aiki - aik larki kis umar ko pohonch kar mature hoti hai and other questions.

Aap mukhtalif topics bana kar mukhtalif andaaz se aik he sawal poochtay hain. Jabke aapke first topic mein aapko solution bataya ja chuka hai, jiske baad answerers doosre topics pe ziada tawajja de rahay hain.

Ans 1: Maturity ko aam alfaaz main "samajhdaari" kaha ja sakta hai. Behen bhaion mein he koi ziada samjhdaar hota/hoti hai jo muamlaat ko bakhoobi sanwarnay main dilchaspi rakhta/ti hai. Jabke unhi behen bhaion main se aik adh ki aadat har kisi se jhagra mol kenay ki, ya ghair-zimmedaari dikhanay ki hoti hai.

Ans 2: Larki aam taur pe 22-25 ki umar main shadi kelye mature hoti hai. Kuch larkian 17-19 ki umar main bhi "shadi kelye mature" hoti hain. Kuch 28-30 ki umar ko pohonch ke bhi nahen ho pateen.

Ans 3: Yeh question # 2 he hai, doosray alfaaz main.

Ans 4: "Jawan" hona aur mature hona main farq hai. Jawan honay ka matlab yeh nahen ke foran he shadi bhi ho jae. Aur kuch loag (male or female) to burhapay ko ponhonch kar bhi mature naheen hotay. Iska yeh matlab nahen ke unhain saari umar shadi he karni nahen chahye.
Yaani ke aapka sawal irrelevant hai.

Ans 5: "Shadi se mutalliq jumla zimmedarion" ki definition aapki nazar main kia hai? Agar larki ki susral main he aisay bhairyay mojud hain jo uski izzat se khailna chahain, maslan agar susar ya dewar he nai dulhan se sex ke khwahishmand hon aur uskay liye tarkeebain laratay phirtay hon, to kam-umar larki unki sazishon ko rok na pae gi aur akhir gang-bang ka shikar hogi.
Kam-umar larki saas nandon ki politics ka bhi ilaaj na kar pae gi.

Ans 6: Iss sawal ka jawab NCF pe baar baar dia ja chuka hai. Ke dunya main 3.5 billion larkian hain. Kuch larkian penis ke size ke hisab se larka pasand karti hain.
Kuch faisla apne maan baap pe chorti hain.
Kuch ko shadi kisi aur se karna hai magar sex kisi aur se. Maslan shadi aik well-settled doctor ya engineer se karna hai jo rozana gadhay ki tarha 18, 18 ghante kamanay mein lagae, lekin sex unhain doggy se (4 paon wala janwar) karwana pasand hota hai, ya phir aisay kisi (human) male se jiska penis bara ho.

Aam taur pe hamaray muashray mein larkian pasand na-pasand se hatt kar, maan baap ki rae mashwara aur faisla ka khair-maqdam karti hain. Iska sada nateeja yeh hai ke larki ko impress na karo, larki ki maan ko shareef ban kar dikhao.

Ans 7: Choonkeh larkay ne apni umar gadhay ki tarah kamatay huay guzarni hai aur jitna ziada woh boorha hoga, uska ziada woh kama chuka hoga. Aur chooke aurat ki daulat uskay jismani husn ko samjha jata hai itni jitni choti woh hogi utna ziada pasandeeda usko samjha jaega.

Ans 8: Iss sawal ka jawab bhi pehle baar baar discuss ho chuka hai lekin aapki aik he ratt hai.
Shariat ne khwamkha pabandian naheen lagaen. Sunnat mein apne se 15 saal bari aurat se shadi bhi shamil hai to 42 saal choti se bhi.
Albatta common sense ko shariat mein kaafi ehmiat hasil hai aur yehi wajah hai ke larkay ki umar larki se thori si ziada hona hamaray muashray main theek samjha jata hai.

Mental understanding: Iska zahiri taur pe umar se koi itna bara talluq nahen. Ham-umar joron main talaaq ki sharah bohot ziada hai. Jabke generation gap wali shadian bhi nakaam hoti hain jiski kuch misalain NCF pe bhi nazar ayngi.

Ans 9: Aapka yeh sawal pehlay bhi discuss ho chuka hai aur ahmaqana bhi hai. Larkian shadi se pehlay ilm rakhti hain ya nahen, unhain kon parhata hai, is se dulhay ko kia sarokaar?

Ans 10: Gaon dehaton mein maternal death ki sharah kafi ziada hai. Naiz gaon dehat ki larkian kafi ziada exposure rakhti hain jabke shehr ki larkion ko sirf theoretical knowledge hota hai, jabke gaon ki larkion ne apni ankhon se gae bail (cow & ox) ka sex, bakray bakri ka sex waghera dekha hota hai kyunkeh gaon main natural mahol jo hota hai.

Ans 11: Yeh bhi aik ahmaqana aur qabl-az-waqt sawal hai. Shadi se pehle bataya jata hai ya nahen. Dulhay ne to nikah ke waqt haan he karni hai.
Agar shadi ke baad dulhay ko mehsus ho ke kuch batain biwi ko naheen maloom, to dulha khud he bata de.
Aam taur pe dulha kora hota hai aur biwi usko parhati hai.

Ans 12: Yeh jaan kar aapko kuch faida nahen hoga. Bas sirf tajassus poora hoga.

Ans 13: Iss muashray mein larki ki pasadeedgi koi haisiyat nahen rakhti. Larki ka baap shadi pe raazi hona chahye.
aiki Group: Members  Joined: 03rd Apr, 2009  Topic: 12  Post: 84  Age:  27  
Posted on:16th Mar 2017, 12:07pm
 

@bushra

Ans 2: Larki aam taur pe 22-25 ki umar main shadi kelye mature hoti hai. Kuch larkian 17-19 ki umar main bhi "shadi kelye mature" hoti hain. Kuch 28-30 ki umar ko pohonch ke bhi nahen ho pateen.

To is sorat-e-haal mein ye kasey maloom kia jaey k larki "shadi kelye mature" hai?

Dosra sawal kia is case mein maturity ko hum kisi insan ki shadi k criteria k tor pey ley saktey hain?

Ans 4: "Jawan" hona aur mature hona main farq hai. Jawan honay ka matlab yeh nahen ke foran he shadi bhi ho jae. Aur kuch loag (male or female) to burhapay ko ponhonch kar bhi mature naheen hotay. Iska yeh matlab nahen ke unhain saari umar shadi he karni nahen chahye.

Yaani ke aapka sawal irrelevant hai.

Ap ney shaid jawab ujlat mein diya hai so I will try to make it understandable for you…marey ilam k mutabiq qanooni (shara’ii lehaz se nahi) lehaz se 18 saal se kam umar larki ki shadi juram hai to jesa k apney kaha k eik larki 17 years mein bhi mature ho sakti hai to qanooni lehaz se to uski shadi phir bhi nahi ho sakti aur agar is doran koi behtar rishta mojod ho to wo tehrta thori hai to phir is sorat-e-haal ka kia taqaza ho ga?

Ans 5: "Shadi se mutalliq jumla zimmedarion" ki definition aapki nazar main kia hai? Agar larki ki susral main he aisay bhairyay mojud hain jo uski izzat se khailna chahain, maslan agar susar ya dewar he nai dulhan se sex ke khwahishmand hon aur uskay liye tarkeebain laratay phirtay hon, to kam-umar larki unki sazishon ko rok na pae gi aur akhir gang-bang ka shikar hogi.

To phir is sorat-e-haal mein larkey ki kia zimma dari banti hai? Obviously ye sorat-e-haal bohat sensitive hai…is k ilawa aur bhi deegar gharelo mamlaat ho saktey hain for example agar ghar rental ho aur mard kam k sisliley mein ghar se bahar ho tab bhi is tarah k masail peda ho saktey hain to is sorat-e-hal mein kia approach apnani chaihye k baat samjha di jaey baghair khof zada kiye huey?

Kam-umar larki saas nandon ki politics ka bhi ilaaj na kar pae gi.

Aur jahan tak saas aur nandon ka masla hai to ye bhi larkey ki zindagi k eham tareen afrad hain to ye to ho nahi sakta k larka un pey compromise kr ley aur aisa aksar dekha bhi gya hai to is sorat-e-hal ko kasey balance kia jaey?

In baton se hatt k bhi mera question shaid ap samjh na sakin to mein apne question ko thora explain karta chalon…suppose eik larki ki umar 17 years hai aur hamarey gharon mein to larki jasey hi jawani ki dehleez pe qadam rakhti hai us ki shadi ki batain shroo ho jati hain. is umar mein insan physical tabdeeliyon ki waja se kafi sensitive bhi hota hai aur quite resistive bhi…mera question is baat se mutaliq tha…hopefully ap samjh gai hon gi….

Aur chooke aurat ki daulat uskay jismani husn ko samjha jata hai itni jitni choti woh hogi utna ziada pasandeeda usko samjha jaega.

Ap ki baat bilkul darust hai magar ap ney is ki waja nahi batai….dosri baat ye bhi dekhi gai hai k kam umar larkian husan ki kami ki waja se reject kr di jati hain to kam umar hona husan ki shart to nahi..mein chahta hon k ap is per bhi kuch roshni daalain…

Generation gap wali shadian bhi nakaam hoti hain jiski kuch misalain NCF pe bhi nazar ayngi.

Generation gap se murad obviously age difference hi hai to ap ki nazar mein minimum kitna age difference generation gap aur bad azaan shadi ki nakami ki waja ban sakta hai?

Ans 9: Aapka yeh sawal pehlay bhi discuss ho chuka hai aur ahmaqana bhi hai. Larkian shadi se pehlay ilm rakhti hain ya nahen, unhain kon parhata hai, is se dulhay ko kia sarokaar?

Sawal chalain ahmqana hi sahi magar jawab relevant hona chahiye…ye sawal pochney ki waja ye thi k aksar mard sex k hawaley se bohat si fantasies rakhtey hain aur un mein se shaid bohat si fantasies hamari societies mein taboo samjhi jati hon gi…to kia eik larki (between 16-18 years) unhain taboo nahi samjhey gi ya in other words kia us ka mind itna perceptive ho ga k wo in sab cheezon ko absorb kr sakey?

Phir ye bhi dekha gya hai k aksar maain ye qareebi rishta dar aurtein shadi k bad shohar ki gher mojodgi mein larki se raaz dari se mutaliq sawal pochti hain (murad bed room se mutaliq relationship) to agar larki ka mind perceptive na ho ya wo kisi sexual activity ko taboo, awkward or weird khayal karti ho to is baat ki kia guarantee reh jati hai k wo ye baatain apni maa ko na bataye gi? To is sorat-e-haal ko kis tarah handle kia jana chahiye?

Ans 11: Yeh bhi aik ahmaqana aur qabl-az-waqt sawal hai. Shadi se pehle bataya jata hai ya nahen. Dulhay ne to nikah ke waqt haan he karni hai.

Agar shadi ke baad dulhay ko mehsus ho ke kuch batain biwi ko naheen maloom, to dulha khud he bata de.

Ap k jawab se eik chhez ka to andaza hota hai k dulhan kuch na kuch janti hai aisa nahi k wo kuch nahi janti. Obviously dulhey ko apne aap to malom nahi ho ga k aya k uski biwi kitna janti hai aur kitna nahi. Aur dosri bat k us ko ye malomat bhi to kisi sey mili hi hongi agar aisa hai to kia ye kaha ja sakta hai k source of education us ki maan ya behan bhi ho sakti hain? ya koi dosrey bhi zaraaye ho saktey hain?

Aam taur pe dulha kora hota hai aur biwi usko parhati hai.

Apki observation interesting hai aur mein is ki wazahat chahon ga (for my better understanding)….

Ans 12: Yeh jaan kar aapko kuch faida nahen hoga. Bas sirf tajassus poora hoga.

Chalain tajassus k liye hi sahi magar eik cheez ka ilam honay mein bhi koi harj nahi. Hopefully you will explain it a little bit…

aiki Group: Members  Joined: 03rd Apr, 2009  Topic: 12  Post: 84  Age:  27  
Posted on:18th Jun 2017, 10:35am
 

@ bushra

It has been days since you posted last time...Kindly hv some time for this post. Activist also promised to contribute but she is also out for months now...
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